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I begin another night of taking pills to fall asleep. I just can't get used to going to bed and she's not laying beside me. I hope she is enjoying herself unfortunately I'm not having as good of a time.

I have had a lot of knots in my stomach the past couple of days and have been nauseous off and on. My back hurts from all the stress. This separation I feel is really starting to affect my health.

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I really breaks my heart that she doesn't live here. She told me she's living with her brother while she saves up some money to get her own place. She gets her own place I'm sure I can kiss our marriage goodbye. Right now it doesn't seem like she has any intention of coming home. She will barely speak to me. I realize I did some things wrong in our marriage but nothing really seems bad enough to warrant divorcing over. Just seems kind of crazy to me to divorce over something so minor. Ok she wants to go out with the girls more often that's not a huge deal to me it never has been. I just want her to come home at night rather than sleep over.

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I'm crushed.....I did one thing the book advises against and looked at my wife's facebook. There is another guy and I feel like I'm spiraling out of control

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her brother called me a few minutes ago..he said she is supposed to be bringing the other guy to his house tonight to meet him. I feel like I need to confront her tonight when the guy is there just so maybe she will finally tell me the truth and I can see the betrayal in her eyes. I feel I deserve to know the truth about her deception.

I think her brother knows it's coming and trying to intervene. he said he may stop by this afternoon just to hang out.

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Quote:
...I'm a little annoyed if she wasn't going to pick up any of her stuff she could have said so at least then I could have spent a little more time with my dad.


Quote:
I even text her earlier to find out if she still was going to be here at 5 and she never did respond


I don't understand why you had to be there if/when she went to get some of her things.


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
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Originally Posted By: sandi2
Quote:
...I'm a little annoyed if she wasn't going to pick up any of her stuff she could have said so at least then I could have spent a little more time with my dad.


Quote:
I even text her earlier to find out if she still was going to be here at 5 and she never did respond


I don't understand why you had to be there if/when she went to get some of her things.



Because when she left she gave me the apartment key so without me there she had no way to get any of her stuff out.

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So I keep reading on other websites that I need to be contacting her friends and family about the affair. That I should be making it public to everyone. is this actually advisable? I know the book says for the LRT do not get help but would letting them know about it actually be asking for help? I don't want to take this approach if it's going to make things a lot worse

I truly love my wife but I have to wonder if this is really worth saving when she is cheating on me regardless of the factor that we no longer live together she is still my wife and I do consider it an affair.

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cancel that last post I found Michele's advise on making an affair public

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She text me a little bit ago to say we needed to talk and that her and her brother are coming over...since she doesn't have a car

She said we needed to talk. I agreed and then she followed that up with a text saying I want a divorce....awesome day for me *sarcasm intended*

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Well she came over and told me she does want a divorce. Was a really hard conversation to have honestly. I kept my confidence throughout the whole thing though and tried my best to seem okay with it. I told her I won't deny her a divorce if that is what she wants because I'll be okay in the end. She said she hopes we can be friends in the end because I've been her best friend for so long. I said maybe one day but right now I need to piece my life back together. I told her I know we both did some things wrong in our marriage so there's no point in assigning blame here. I just said I think the problem is our communication broke down and got us to this point. I said it's actually pretty sad that it got to this point. She said we didn't do anything wrong she just needs to know that she can stand on her own two feet right now and wants to be alone. I said well there really wasn't a need to be along personally I would rather invest in something worthwhile myself. I told her again it's ok because I'll be ok.

She didn't admit an affair and I didn't bother to pursing it. The very little it was mentioned her facial expressions pretty well owned up to it. So now I don't know if I should just cease all contact with her period or not. I really don't want this marriage to end but she seems to be dead set on it.

When she left she said she would text me later tonight. Who knows if she actually will or not.

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