Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Well I Back Slid This Weekend

Well i really backslid again me and my wife have been talking and she confided in me yesterday that a guy at her salon had asked her out to lunch and she had been talking to him on the phone. well u know me i lost it and we argued all day i said some pretty mean things and told her if she went out with someone she would never come back here and i meant it. She responded saying why do you say that. Well last night after everything calmed down i apologized and she said u always say mean things and then say your sorry she then said see you had an affair and were forgiven but god forbid i even think about another man. Well as usual she turned the conversation sexual and we talked till eleven. She ended it saying were just not good for each other and that she cared for me but doesn't mean she can live with me. She also said she wanted to be friends for our son. Hell i dont know what to think im back at square one i think.

but for some reason this morning in not so upset about the guy that asked her out. Guess it was just the initial shock

bond you have been my mentor any suggestions on how to recover from this

well folks im back at square one. she went out this weekend with her friends for her birthday got very intoxicated and ended up back at a friends house with a guy from the bar. of course i went off she responds saying that nothing has changed with me and there is too much for me to work on to save our marriage. she also said that we both need to work on ourselves that maybe in a year or to we may end up back to together but right now she doesn't love me at all and dosnt wanna spend time with me. i think i tried to approach her before i was fully detached. gonna go a little dark again no calls or text and only talk about our son.

John, so sorry to hear about your situation. I feel for you, it must be so hard.

I did not follow the original post, is she still living with you? If so, then wow.

no paper, were separated, divorce filed but not finalized. she says nutten happened that he just rode home with them and didn't spend the night with us. dont want u to think she is all at fault in this i was controlling and jealous. she says that we can be friends then after a long time we may can get back together. whats frustrating is i had come so far even to the point of us talking every day and even sleeping together i just pushed her to get back together and became my old self and she ran fast.

you did it once, you can do it again John. Just keep doing the things that worked.

thanks brian actually it wasn't bad as i though she still responds to my text messages and talks to me just says she is sick of the way i act about stuff. I know your not supposed to believe anything they say and half of what they do but i really feel like if she was completely done with me and wanted me out of her life she wouldn't respond to me and def. wouldnt be saying we may reconcile later down the road

the biggest thing ive done is quit reading into what she says. when she started talking to me after 3 months of no contact i questioned why but now i just have to go with the flow.

Just move on. That's a I can say. She is nothing more than the mother of your child. Keep reminding yourself of that.