Well, I've spent all day on the run, gathering papers and reports. Saw my L, who says he doubts very seriously that any legal action can be taken as the things are still legally " Half His" BUT, they are also HALF MINE. Also, unless H admits to it, well, there is nothing they can do unless I file on the insurance and then he is found with the items.
On the bright side, my L says he is feeling very good about my chances for alimony, even if it's paying the house pymt. until it sells for starters. He thinks I have a very good case. I hope the judge sees it that way. No, I PRAY the judge sees it that way.
By the way, H emailed my old email and asked if it wouldn't be convenient for him to come by before we go to court and decide which of the household things were 'his half'. This one day after I discover the lock cut off. I moved the lawn tractor into the garage, where it will stay from now on. I do not intend to reply.
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
Punkin, If you don't say anything more about the items, your h will tell on himself. They all tend to have loose lips and love to talk about how they screwed you over. Just bide your time...
When I discovered things missing, I made a list, wrote down what we had paid for the items and then split the total amount in half. When it came time for settlement, my lawyer presented him the bill to buy me out of my half of the items. Some will say that this is splitting hairs, but what my xh took totaled to a hefty amount.
I wouldn't respond to his email. I suspect it's his way of wanting to see what your reaction is to the "theft". They are so transparent about their actions. I wouldn't address it w/him for now.
BTW, don't you find it odd that you discovered the "missing" items after your trip to New Orleans? Again, another way of getting back at you for leaving and having some fun. Some mlcers do this to the lbs.
I hope that you have a pleasant weekend. Stay as quiet as a church mouse...the answers will land in your lap!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Oh Punkin, Snodderly is so right on. An email from him after the fact is him 'fishing' to see what you have to say about the missing items. It will drive him crazy not to hear from you. Hopefully, the kids won't say anything to him about it.
I love what she had her L do. Give that some thought...
I am going to echo everyone else and say that Snodderly is right.
I remember, while I was away one weekend, my STBXH, was supposed to be staying with S, and ended up accepting overtime at the last minute. It was then MY fault that there was no one to stay with S, because I was out of town and had left him to be a responsible parent.
When I told him it was his S too, he said that in the past, it was different because I wasn't out having fun, I was either working or something, so it was ok for him to have to handle it then, but since I was now living my life, it was all my responsibility. Which I found to be hilarious in a twisted sort of way.
Another day in the life I guess...
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
I appreciate all the advice, and I do agree. Staying 'quiet as a church mouse' is a hard act for me, but I'm going to do it.
What he did was cowardly and low, and I hope the judge sees it that way. Using our D24 was low, as well, and shows me how little regard he has for their feelings, or for our grandchildren, which is just beyond me to comprehend.
Thank you Snodderly, Cat, Seeking, Brooklyn, Antonia, Eric and anyone else who has seen me through this episode of the Twilight Zone comes to the Ouachita Mountains.
Well, it's 70 degrees here and completely cloudy. Was really hoping for some sunshine today. BMF is coming over at 10:00 and help me tie my yellow climbing roses into an arch. I've always wanted to do that, and H wouldn't help me. It is definitely not a one man job. We have to build a small scaffold to do it.
Trying to get up the 'get up and go' and get going. As Brooklyn says, " Get to gettin". Despite my resolve, still didn't sleep well last night, and don't like taking a pill two nights in a row.
Did take my 'winter duds' off the bed and changing over to Spring. Lighten the place up.
Coffee's kickin' in. Have a great weekend everyone. Hope somebody out there is getting some sunshine!
Punkin, Yes, it's difficult to remian quiet as a church mouse...but in order to discover whether he actually did it or not....you have to do it. Their lips do flap when they want to tell the world just what outstanding people they are and yes, how they con people out of what they have.
I do hope that you are able to tie off your climbing roses. I've got to do something similiar to that myself.
Please try to enjoy you day and not allow his antics to bring you down.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Hey Punkin glad to hear you're going to get out and do some work outside. I decided last night to skip the faculty/staff get together at a pub and go to Lowes and get some plants, and I came home and worked my a*s off, and I did have trouble sleeping but it was because of soreness this time instead of "him" so I guess that's an improvement. I think a lot of us will get a lot of good from just being outside or doing work outside. Goodluck with your roses!
M45 Bomb 6/09; EA 6/10; Divorced 1/11 Proud single mom of 7 little feline girls and one little feline boy "Fall down 53 times. Get up 54." -- Zen saying
