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grr #2140327 03/16/11 08:46 PM
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Hope your S gets better soon, grr!


Me - 33 W - 33
S - 9 months
M - 3 years
T - 5.5 years
Bomb - 12/14/10 ILYBNILWY
PA discovered - 1/18/11
PA began - 3/22/10
Separated
sparks14 #2140549 03/17/11 05:09 PM
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grr Offline OP
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thanks for the well wishes
he is def. on the mend

and in other news

h is at our home on the west coast
he was adamant about fixing it up and selling or renting it, so that one of us has the money to buy a new home on the east coast

well he has been there since sunday, and the only thing he has done, is go to the skatepark everyday, or hang out at his recording studio

very confusing

i could read into this, that he is unsure that he really wants a divorce, but i think he is just lazy


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grr #2140550 03/17/11 05:15 PM
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Originally Posted By: grr
well he has been there since sunday, and the only thing he has done, is go to the skatepark everyday, or hang out at his recording studio

I know it is bad for me to say but.... That sounds like fun!!! laugh


Originally Posted By: grr
i could read into this, that he is unsure that he really wants a divorce, but i think he is just lazy

That is something I think about as well since my W has still not filed. But one thing we know, we cannot read their minds. When we try we are almost certain to be wrong.

Hang in there grr. We have no idea what the future will bring, so there is always a chance of greatness! smile


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Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
♪CS♪ #2140582 03/17/11 06:54 PM
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I don't think there is a chance of greatness at all...I am certain of it. I think we just forget from time to time and need to be reminded


BITS

M:34 W:28
SD:9
D:6 (pr)
M:3 T:6
Separated 1/16/11
ILYBNILWY 10/25/10
PA discovered 11/12/10, began about 10/1/10

I am not who I was, I am being remade, I am new...
islander #2140720 03/18/11 02:14 AM
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grr,
That is a tough one. Sounds like there could be some indecision in his WAS world... or the depression that has resulted from him choosing to destroy your marriage may be paralyzing him a bit...

Hard to say without knowing him personally.

Hang in there!

FOBD


Me: 39
W: 36
T: 15 yrs
M: 9 yrs
S: 09/10

So you can get on with your search, baby
And I can get on with mine
And maybe someday we will find,
That it wasn't really wasted time...
FellOnBlackDays #2140789 03/18/11 01:21 PM
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grr

He is thinking always thinking. It is the one constant with your H. He does not want to let go but he does not want to stay. Back and forth back and forth.

In the meantime you keep doing what you are doing.


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2stepboogie #2140972 03/19/11 01:03 AM
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grr Offline OP
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hey 2step
what do you mean by, "he's always thinking"?

and you keep it up too

i think you are making great strides


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grr #2141021 03/19/11 05:44 AM
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grr, your H seems to be reading the same guide book as my W. They actually have no idea what they want. My C told me that my w "clearly doesn't want to be married, but clearly doesn't want to be divorced." He also thinks she is much more in need of therapy than I.

Good luck, grr. You still have some tough sledding ahead, but you will do fine. I know you will!

FOBD


Me: 39
W: 36
T: 15 yrs
M: 9 yrs
S: 09/10

So you can get on with your search, baby
And I can get on with mine
And maybe someday we will find,
That it wasn't really wasted time...
FellOnBlackDays #2141093 03/19/11 06:22 PM
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grr Offline OP
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thanks fobd.....i know we both are going to be great

just venting here: last night my h called from west coast

i spoke for about 30 seconds, handed my s the phone

my h heard that my sister was over (they have a great relationship)
he wanted to talk to her, but she really did not want to
she took the phone anyway, and could not get him off

she was friendly enough, but at the end of the convo, he kept saying he loved her and missed her
she did not return the sentiment

just find it ironic that it's been so long since i've heard that from him

and also that he thinks they are going to have the same relationship...ALTHOUGH... it will be the best thing for my s if they do

one thing i have noticed, is that for the past few days, when we speak on the phone, his voice and mannerisms remind me of the way he sounded when we first met
his voice is a bit more high pitched and he talks faster

i don't think it means anything,,just a funny observation.....or could it be me, hearing him differently because i am starting to feel differently?

i don't know


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grr #2141099 03/19/11 06:58 PM
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Hey GRRR, just read up on your thread. You have a lot of people that care about you.

One thing I noticed, and please dont be offended cause I do the same thing, is that you analyze EVERYTHING.

What does he mean by this or that?

Im going to try and not read into everything and somehow try and strive to not reading into ANYTHING.

I think the only thing to read into is if they say: I am very sorry for all the heartache I have caused and want my family back including a great realtionship with you"

Then there is no analysis by paralysis and you can trully focus on yourself and s.

Just my two cents.

9


BITS
M-46
W-42
M-16y
T-19 y
s10 s15
BombDec.19/09
Sep-F16/10
Sep Papers signed by W- June 30/10
Recon July 5/10
PA foundOut- Oct 30/10
Mental HospNov/10
moved out Nov/10
Leg Sep Mar 15/11
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