Don't assume and don't mind read John. I've read up on your sitch even though I don't always post. There is a lot of people I read about and don't post.
You had sex in the back of the car!! I am jealous, I would have sex in the back of a barn right now!
Sandi is right. Baby steps and if she wants to talk this weekend let her.
You can't assume it is OM anymore than you can assume it is her telling you about winning the lottery. You don't know so keep your expectations and imagination in check.
boogie u just cant help but wonder. She wants a divorce but went out with me sat had wild sex and now wants to go out this weekend and talk and have sex again. i know some say she is using me for whatever reason but i know if i had someone else i cared about i wouldn't be having sex with my stbx
John, like 2step I haven't been posting, but you need to listen to him. I know it's hard, but unless she specifically told you she wanted sex again this weekend or specifically told you there was OM, you can't assume those things. Even if she said them, remember not to believe half of what they say.
Deep breaths and do whatever you can to minimize expectations and mind reading. They do nothing but raise your blood pressure and anxiety.
Me 43 W 38 M 5 T 7 SD20 S15, S13 with 1st W ILYBNILWY June 2010 Separation/Bomb July 2010 Divorce Feb 8, 2011
boogie u just cant help but wonder. She wants a divorce but went out with me sat had wild sex and now wants to go out this weekend and talk and have sex again. i know some say she is using me for whatever reason but i know if i had someone else i cared about i wouldn't be having sex with my stbx
To wonder is one thing, I am not going to be a hypocrite and say I don’t wonder about my W although at this time there is no OM that’s not to say there could be one in the future. To act on your suspicion is what I am cautioning you about. I know you are not.
The fact that she wants to talk is a good thing. Either way you are heading into a convo with some tools on your belt and that is a good thing.
boogie we talked a lil last night she said she can see ive changed but believes its cause im just scared of losing her. Im actually not scared or obsessed any longer. Then she says people dont just change like that that im still the same person. I ask her in closing to put the divorce on the dead docket for right now and she said what is that i said we put it on hold and see how things continue progressing she responded saying i dont know ill think about it
boogie we talked a lil last night she said she can see ive changed but believes its cause im just scared of losing her. Im actually not scared or obsessed any longer. Then she says people dont just change like that that im still the same person. I ask her in closing to put the divorce on the dead docket for right now and she said what is that i said we put it on hold and see how things continue progressing she responded saying i dont know ill think about it
She is right people don't change overnight. That is why consistency is the key. Your actions will speak louder than your words. She is unsure and does not trust you yet, and that is ok. The fact that she is thinking about anything regarding the two of you is very good. My W has also said the "I don't know comment" to me. I guess it is better than a flat out no
