yes you should leave your questions about the affair alone if you are going to forgive, you need to move on from it and the letter, well, i have done that, and regretted it immediately but it is done and move on from it
she made a very dramatic exit, throwing the food in the sink
she sounds very angry right now and you did well at keeping you cool very well done
Thanks, grr. I really need to detach from the affair if I am going to get to a point of forgiveness. It has just been easier said than done. My W has not agreed to completely reconcile. She had mentioned "shelving" the OW while she figured herself and us out. It has been hard not to think of the possibilities, but it is not healthy for me to not detach and definitely not a good DB technique to bring OW up right now our ask for reassurances.
In a normal circumstance, this would have been one of those times where we fought and both of us would get louder and louder. I am learning right now to just let it go and give in to the argument.
Me - 33 W - 33 S - 9 months M - 3 years T - 5.5 years Bomb - 12/14/10 ILYBNILWY PA discovered - 1/18/11 PA began - 3/22/10 Separated
Sparks, When our S commits A we ARE owed an apology BUT they will not give it in most cases. I understand your need for assurance. I can't tell you how far I have gone to verify that my W's EA is over. And she HAS ended her EA. If it IS going on then they are doing some crazy things to hide it. I check EVERYTHING!!!
Yes, I too have had the urge to ask but I don't.
Your mistake is minor. She DOES understand. Let her work through this herself.
You are doing great work!
I totally agree. I have been working hard at this, but I just let it slip this time in a moment of weakness and suspicion.
Me - 33 W - 33 S - 9 months M - 3 years T - 5.5 years Bomb - 12/14/10 ILYBNILWY PA discovered - 1/18/11 PA began - 3/22/10 Separated
