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Grr... I'm sure that you did look hot! Too bad that there isn't a BITS facebook page where we could all look at each other, RIGHT?! LOL...

grr... your H is an a$s for the way that he's behaving. Most likely, this is just typical WAS behavior. I don't want to hit you with the same 2x4s that you've already been hit with, but some of the things that you did with him since he's been back have been PRESSURING... What is the WAS going to do when they feel pressured?

That's right... pull away.

That doesn't excuse his behavior, but it probably gives you an explanation. I don't think that it's bc he doesn't care about what is going on with you. He just doesn't know how to behave when he thinks that he's sure about wanting out of the M, but you are pressuring him to stay.

He's confused too. I promise.

BITS
Denver

i have stopped pressuring - for today, anyway
no more
i am black and blue from you guys

he is a pretty disconnected guy, emotionally
i believe he does care, but his instinct is to take care of himself first
it's his world and we all pretty much exist in it

it has been this way from the beginning


it would be great to have a fb page
and see all the fake pictures that people put up
mine would be angelina jolie

grr,

I just got off the phone with the DB coach and came right to you. Highlights I wanted to share with you

Small contact is good
Stay positive
Developing friendship is important
When he complains about you or something you did acknowledge, accept, and respond kindly
Don't get caught up in what he is doing or what he is saying and never react

Thought I would share

thanks 2step
i appreciate that

my update:
he is not going away today
has nothing to do with me tho'. his brother (who was driving) wanted to stay an extra day

this morning he said he is going to stay somewhere else tonight (he wanted to last night, but since i was going out he stayed at our home with s)

i didn't respond except to say that since i thought he and s wouldn't be home i made some plans

he told me we would work that out, but he was still staying somewhere else

he and s just went to breakfast, while s was getting dressed we sat at table and had a good convo about his friends that i was with last night

nothing good, nothing bad....i'm just trying to keep positive, and not talk about r

its getting easier

but you are doing the right thing. Haven't you seen when you have gone pretty disconnected that he has reached out to you? Even a little bit?

Keep doing that because that little bit will become a little bit more.

The FB thing that I found that does work is the db fan page. It seems funny to have a "fan" page about anything related to divorce but there are some good things that get posted. I'll take just about any help I can get.

I agree with the fake pix :0 Mine would be of a praying mantis

bolt you are right
he does reach out, very much in his own way
which is all he can do
i guess because it isn't in a conventional way, that is understand, i have been a bit disconnected
so there you go

are you on that fb page?

is there more to be learned from there?

and i do picture you looking like a praying mantis...brown, because you are sitting on a tree.

and you have glasses

and a martini in your little mantis claw

I am. You should definitely check it out. Just like it or whatever - I'm so not fb savvy.

It's so hard to read people so that's why they say what, believe nothing what you hear and 50% of what you see? somethin like that.

as far as the mantis, at least I'm not headless which, I'm not sure what that means...

it would mean that your woman had you and then bit your head off!
true

by the way, i'm joining the page
thanks

HA! exactly...

sounds like a great idea for a cartoon series...

if only someone (brilliant and funny) would have come up with that?

or has it?