Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers WAW Staying Positive Is Positively Painful

As for her financial struggle, the judge didn't buy into it and sided with me on everything. W was so angry at her attorney, she just sat with arms crossed giving her the dirtiest look! W even began talking to explain things better because she felt her attorney wasn't getting it done, and she wasn't! So then the DAGGER! Her attorney (if you wanna call her that) at the end of it was so pissed at getting her butt handed to her that she literally threw a tantrum in the courtroom! Ranting about how she would appeal (of course cost my W more $... That's her only goal it seems). She began making comments to my W but clearly directed at me... Very Pathetic Display!

So my W stood in the doorway defeated... I STILL FELT BAD! I just saw our past life and my children in her face. I wanted her to at least look at me... She never did.

W has been asking me alot lately to switch days, to accomodate her dates I'm sure... Yes I know, I mostly don't care. I have no interest in speaking to her let alone helping her any longer... So now she continues to ask for favors, or questions re things she could make an effort to find out herself... I answer only things pertaining to kids... I don't do favors. Maybe that is not wise, but I'm past being a schmucko who gets taken advantage of by whoever she is.

On the lighter side, been GAL still... Going out for fun alot... Took kids to a Monster Truck show... FUN!!!! Went out for a football game with the guys last night... GO PACK GO... Were going to the Super Bowl Baby!!!!

Doing ok, but I get a day here n there still where Im blue. At this point I'm sad to say, I'm anxious to get the D part over with... Not sure where this is going still... Idk. Ttyl

Glad to hear things are working out in your favor at least finacially B2D.

I'm sorry your W refused to even acknowledge you but maybe that will help to give you some closure? IDK.

Good luck and keep us in the loop as you can. I appreciate the strength I'm able to get from following your sitch.

Thank you for that!

BITS
SIC

Well no new news really... leaning heavily towad throwing in the towel.

Packers are Super Bowl Champs!

Well W has admitted she is dating multiple men, she says currently I have a "few things going on" referring to her intrests, and I should of course move on as she has. So much for "not wanting a relationship" as she indicated early on. She is still upset about losing the first hearing and not getting the boatloads of $ she wasn't entitled to, so naturally she said she would be going for my pension and the max she can instead of her previous claim, "I will not take more than 100k, no matter what" and to not touch my pension. I knew that was balogna when she first said that obviously. Greed! It's such a shame to see what she has become. I suggested we put 1/2 of my IRA into a trust for the kids college, which is what we planned to use it for, she had no intrest in that... Sad! I will still be fighting for them to get what was intended to be theirs!

She still barely has the kids, in fact, this week she had them 1 day and on that day she dropped them off to be watched by her sister overnight, I suspect so she could party, bacause she certainly looked like she partied the next morn whenshe dropped the back off.

I told her since she is getting $ for watching them 1/2 the time and barely has them, she should considered having them on our shared days, which occur ever three months (that month she only has them one day per week). She became upset and stated she wanted to keep the schedule as it is, because she can get days to herself. I was like WTF, be a mother! I love my kids, but she needs to step up and take resposibility... Besides the kids need to see her more... They do enjoy seeing her... That's important for them regardless how I feel. So I plan to have the judge make her take them on those shared days, so she is forced to be more involved. I'm hoping she'll accept it and not cause a big display, she likely will.

Cause a display that is. BTW... Is not wanting to be more involved as a parent normal for WAWs too? I know she loves them, but WOW seems to have little motherly emotions. Alot like her own mother in fact.

Not sure what to do right now?! Hand on the plug and starting to pull!

Not sure if that's normal or if you can call anything "normal" with a WAW. Maybe "abnormal"?

Anyways, my W only cares about the kids. She wants to sell our house and buy a little place just for her and kids. Who cares about me.

Although she usually follows that with "you'll be so much better off anyways" and "you can see the kids whenever you want" and "you can have them on weekends".

Ya, that will be just like how it is now?!?!

I always worry about the financial aspects, as she keeps telling me this is her choice and that she will stand or own and only wants child support to help with kids, none of my pension or RRSP's and no ailimony. She was talking to the bank yesterday, and she only has $7000 in RRSP so I'll be shocked if she doesn't try to get more from me.

As for the current sitch, I don't see what other choice you have. I'm just at the phase where I am starting to agree with my W and want to work with her on the seperation plans. It seems to be really messing with her head.

She seems like a different person everyday to be honest. I'm starting to believe that the only way to save my M is for us to seperate so I can take the time to go dark and be happy myself because I find the sitch always brings me down.

Good luck B2BD, glad to hear and update from you. I believe I will be in your shoes in the next 3 months.

BITS
SIC

Sounds like your WAW needs to feel the freedom she so dearly wants. I hope she changes a little for the children's sake, and you get to use the monies she wants, for the kids college. Now is the time to protect your children and not feel sorry for a mother who may love them, but not enough to keep their family together.

I'm sorry, but I can't stand women like this. My brother's ex is the same (actually worse) except she didn't want anything to do with the kids. Now, the one daughter is grown, and found her mother when she had a baby. She wanted her mom to know she was a grandmother --- the B told my niece that she wanted nothing to do with her or the baby and to leave her alone. Sorry excuse for a mother. She is an alcoholic, so I will be kind and say it was the drink talking. But, she has pulled the most nasty things on her kids, that my brother even got custody of his step-daughter. I have my faults as a mom, but sheesh!

Could the judge mandate parental classes?