Hi Confounded. It's been a couple of weeks since you last posted... I hope you're still checking on this.
First, I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this pain... it's not easy to say the least. Have you been applying the DB tactics in the book? Like GAL, acting as-if, detaching... these things will help you begin to sort out what's the best approach for you. You both were involved with other people in some way... have you determined the reason why you leaned on someone else emotionally?
When she says things like she's never coming back or that everything's your fault try to remember to not believe half of what she says...
Maybe posting a more detailed story on the Newcomers board would help as well.
Me 34 H 37 M 12/97 H moved out 03/09 D 05/10 S 17 D 12 S 11
Hi Confounded. It's been a couple of weeks since you last posted... I hope you're still checking on this.
First, I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this pain... it's not easy to say the least. Have you been applying the DB tactics in the book? Like GAL, acting as-if, detaching... these things will help you begin to sort out what's the best approach for you. You both were involved with other people in some way... have you determined the reason why you leaned on someone else emotionally?
When she says things like she's never coming back or that everything's your fault try to remember to not believe half of what she says...
Maybe posting a more detailed story on the Newcomers board would help as well.
Me 34 H 37 M 12/97 H moved out 03/09 D 05/10 S 17 D 12 S 11
Tried to remain friendly almost dating at times for 6 months after separation but divorce was final 2 weeks ago. He had an emotional affair online and possible more with a local lady at the same time which both are still ongoing today.
This week he pours his heart out crying and telling me all his feels, he misses me, he's sorry and hugs me holds my hand....first physical contact since separation. But no promise of our future, just leaves conversation open.
2 things Its hard not to get my expectations up of wanting something more, or to expect him to drop the other ladies overnight and trust him again.
I told him last night to change all his passwords because i loved him but was tired of hurting and knowing what was going on. He of course was very angry said the most hurtful things during all this, but now is willing to meet. But just needed to clear my head of what i knew when i should have never snooped.
He does have some depression and bipolar issue which add to the drama.
Just don't know where to go between my feelings, his feelings and reality. I don't want to hurt him or be hurt, but i also know there is love left between us we are just stuck!!!!
