Divorcebusting.com Forums Divorcebusting.com Archives For Newcomers Archives Losing my motivation....need some advice quick...

UPDATE.....

Weird cosmic force in the air! I am going for a second consult with a diff atty tommorrow AM to discuss diving assets and liabilites. Again, doing this just to protect myself. Court date is set for 2/8/11 IF uncontested.

Here's the weird cosmic part....H happend to call tonight about discussing the same issue that I am going to the A for tommorrow. He doesn't know that I may seek legal counsel at this juncture. I didn't answer the phone-he left a message. He sounded uncomfortable; lots of pauses and ums like he couldn't get the words out. He just sounded bad and it made me very sad. I did call him back; figured if I got to talk to him about the basics, I could be better prepared for tommorrow but he didn't pick up the phone. He did say some nice things I think...he said he hoped my holidays were good and that he was sorry to hear that I was feeling sick (I had bronchitis all last week). I don't want to overanalyze it, but maybe he just said those things for lack of anything else to say. There was no remorse or sadness in his voice - guess it's just going to happen.

I also felt sad in my heart because when I saw his number on caller ID I got such a pit in my stomach and thought whenever I saw that number pop up prior to this whole mess, how eager and happy I was that he was calling. It just makes me very, very sad to think that this is where we are at.

PRETTY PLEASE Dbmod! BUMP!!!

Has he been in contact with you since then?

Gypsy... ((((((((((((hugs))))))))))) Sorry I just saw this!!!!

Did you see the A? Did the H call back?

No, MB he has not.

Hope....

I did see the A. It went very well considering what the premise is all about. I liked her, she was very down to earth and she is working with me in terms of cost because she knows I cannot afford a $3500-$4000 retainer. Her thought was he is going thru a total MLC (she said he's certainly of the age) and that one day he's going to realize that you were the best thing that ever happend to him the question is...will you be there?!

He hasn't called me back. But I have this feeling he may call tonight.

How r u doing?

TYVM dbmod

Gypsy - Any particular reason that you think he will call tonite?

What does your A think that she can do for you at this point? Any chance that she can slow the D process down some to buy you more time?

BITS
Denver

hi zen...i am so sorry for your heartbreak.
i agree with denver...you need to find the girl he fell in love with and as hard as it is to be friends....it will be helpful to you in the long run
when i was here last year, i realized that going dark would be bad for me, as my husband has abandonment issues (mom left when he was 3 and his dad proceeded to marry 4 more times, none worked out)
so i needed to modify the lessons i was learning here
i got my own life and didn't pursue, but i also, every so often, let him know he was special to me
i think you have to work with the method, but use what you know about your spouse
i hope this helps some
i am there with you
i had another chance, but we didn't change anything, so here i am again
lots of love tonight

Denver, well he didn't call. I just thought he would to get the discussion over with. No other particular reason.

My A is just for protection for me. She could only prob slow it down my 4 weeks. It's not going to change anything sadly. If you ever want a "quickie" divorce, just come to Connecticut. They have very loose divorce laws and people like me, don't really have a leg to stand on. Since it's a no fault state, all the plantiff needs to claim is reconcilable differences. You don't have to prove anything. The parties do get a 90 day "cooling off period" to see if you want to change your mind etc. But, I knew my H wouldn't so I as that time draws to a close, I needed to hire someone to protect me.

BTW Denver, what's BITS?!