Divorcebusting.com Forums Divorcebusting.com Archives For Newcomers Archives second verse same as the first

Welcome coach to the 2stepboogie house of mirrors and confusion! lol your advice is certainly welcomed. I am prepared for her not to follow through on the DB session. Either way I will call and do it, hopefully she joins me but if not I will atleast get the benefit.

Have you had a chance to look over my situation?

Yay! That convo was awesome! Some major stuff there. It's awesome that you guys really talked and connected.

Definitely be prepared for her to waver on the DB session. You said zero expectations, now live it. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. It's a great step, but she make take two quick steps backwards now.

Be patient. Be collected. And just focus on your stuff, your D and your GAL stuff.

Thank you Michelle,

She has texted a few times today about the weather and such. But I agree. I am starting to believe I will be just fine either way and it is almost peaceful. Sometimes I get really excited but then I get down. So I am trying to keep my expectations in check and to a minimum

That's because you WILL be fine either way!

You have no control over her, only yourself. Your actions might influence her, but you can't control her. And she'll need time to make any decisions. And nothing will happen overnight even if she does turn in the D papers.

You have time. You have hope.

The ups and downs are normal. You'll have them for a while to come. Just ride them out and make sure you are doing things to take care of you.

Thank you Michelle for the encouragement. The distance thing is so hard to deal with. Last night convo was going so good I almost asked her if I could come down for few days to have some lunch or dinner.

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Nicely played Denver. How fickle we are!! I must remain focused but it sure did feel good.

HOLY COW!!! I jumped on here tonight, saw Denver's post, saw Lost's post and now this. 3 FOR 3 for the BITS!!!!! There must be something in the water today.

2step,
I am going to tell you the same thing my father used to tell me when I played baseball, "Son, focus, do your best and LISTEN TO YOUR COACHES. They are there for a reason." Same applies here. This is all great news, but don't lose your sense of balance. I have to agree, she will probably back out or waiver on the coaching session. My W did the same thing with our MC. On Denver's post tonight, I made this comment and I will use it again. According to my C, a WAS is one of the most unstable people around. They think they have life all figured out and when it doesn't go their way, they act very strangely. Tread carefully now. You are in the thickest part of the forest and you don't want to get lost.

You know the old joke about when a man is trying not to get "too excited," he should think about dead cats or nuns? Same applies here. You don't want to lose your cool to early and lose your progress.

None the less, I came to my computer tonight so down and hearing all this good news is really lifting my spirits. Remember, you have a long way to go, but you are making very, very nice progress. Another BITS winning this round. I am stoked. Keep us posted!

BITS never walk alone!

FOBD

Hey FOBD,

Welcome back. Yeah I was pretty happy most of the day and I believe we could have probably talked another two hours but sometimes you have to quit while you’re ahead. The hardest part right now is keeping expectations at bay. Like I said earlier we spoke again around noon and sealed the deal for a time for next week to speak to the DB but as you know a week in our state is a long freaking time, might as well be next year.

A perfect example of expectations....since we had such a nice talk and it continued to today followed by some text I was sure she would call tonight. She didn't. As a result I am little bumed out, but that is my own fault. It's the up and down at least now I am better prepared for the down turns. If it wasn't for you,denver,mj,hope,dixi,sandi,michele,s2d,1step,lost,mr bond,true, j3b,and some others I would still be in the fetal position.

You guys lift the soul! I think this is the most dangerous part of the communication maybe right now she needs to stop and think about what we spoke about and do her own thinking. My desperation and anxiety will not win this battle.

“Faith is not simply a patience that passively suffers until the storm is past. Rather, it is a spirit that bears things - with resignations, yes, but above all, with blazing, serene hope.”

I had to chuckle at the fetal position comment bc it is so true for me too.