Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis XH is off his pedestal and I'm moving forward

Hi GAG

I am not sure I can remember what "flirty thoughts" are but trying to send some anyway!

So sorry that your plans fell thru for the trip...20" of snow..wow and yuck! We only got a couple of inches but it blew like it was a blizzard...so glad that is all we got! What other plans can you make! NYE was always one of my favorite holidays in the past...a new year, new chances, new outlook and all of that stuff!

Keep thinking good and positive thoughts!!! And kick some A tomorrow!!!

CW,

THank you VERY much for your kind words! I REALLY appreciate it! I laughed out loud when I read your post.

I will try to make you proud tomorrow.

How are things with you? I need to visit your thread.

GAG

Hello GAG,

It's 4:36am.....

Have a Wonderful Wednesday.....

Going to be telepathically sending you flirty thoughts all day long.....

I hope you and Mr. GAG give each other a TT workout like never before.....the time away just might make this game extra special.

Give Mr. GAG a taste of what he's been missing out on for the past month. Leave him wanting more of you.....

I'll look back in tonight for an update.

You go girl....

Sanderika

Sending flirty vibes all the way to GAG!

Flirty tips:

Wipe your mouth with your finger and let it linger on your lips a moment longer!

Bending over the TT table, stretch a leg out behind you..
Drop that ball and make sure you dont bend your knees when retreaving it off the floor..

Tshirts vnecks, and a necklaces in a Y shape as the bottom points towards your best assets and play with the end of it..

Lots of eye contact and lower your gaze (come to bed eyes)

Heels, yes high and sexy (this might take practice to stop you falling off them)

The old fiddle with your hair trick

Also a oldie but goodie what were you wearing when you met H, I was sat on a wall in black jeans and tshirt.. Believe me black jeans still work on Mr Rabbit thirty years later lol!

Will try and think of some more for you!

Hi GAG - sending you buckets of "flirty thoughts" (oops had to correct...wrote filthy lol).

Besides being flirty...remember to be happy, confident, smiling, joking...laughing at his jokes even if they are not funny, and beat his butt at TT will you?

Have a great game (((hugs)))

Thank you VERY much ladies for your encouragement today! I had a VERY busy day in clinic. I was pretty pooped, had a headache, and was still feeling disappointed about my sister ditching me for our planned New Years trip to LA (BTW, I decided this may have been divine intrvention --- sister and her daughter are very negative recently. Sister is taking her XH to court, 15 years after D because he hasn’t paid what he was supposed to for D’s college education --- D is supposed to testify against her father. She states she wants nothing to do with her father. I probably would have been surrounded by negativity if I had gone to LA, so I’m seeing the glass as half full right now.)

Anyway, I didn’t know how I could feel like flirting and being fun with XH……but when I read your encouraging posts Sanderika, Rabbit (you little MINX!!!!), and Mila, it inspired me! So thank you ladies VERY much! I flirted like crazy tonight!

XH and I played TT for 2 hours tonight. We laughed and had a great time! I am playing better and I think I am challenging XH enough that he enjoys playing with me.

Early in the game I told XH that his BMF had contacted me twice (text on Thanksgiving Day and asked to "friend" me on FB). I asked if XH had any idea why BMF had contacted me because BMF never contacted me while XH and I were in a R. XH said he didn’t know why BMF had done that and that BMF hadn’t told him about it. He said maybe BMF wants to date me. I let it drop at that point. Let XH keep that thought in his brain. Didn’t remind XH how repulsed I am by BMF because of his depraved behavior. Does anyone think I should reply to BMF after this? I don’t see any advantage to it.

About 10 minutes into our game, we talked about the 9 year old girls that I play TT with in the league. I said to XH “You know, there are only two 9 year olds in the league. All the others are adults. Maybe I should unbutton my top (shirt) buttons to gain an advantage…..” At that point I unbuttoned the top 3 buttons on my cobalt blue knit shirt to demonstrate and left them unbuttoned the rest of the evening. This was significant because on our very first date I was wearing a cobalt blue shirt and at one point I unbuttoned the top button. H/XH later told me that he saw that as a very good sign when I did that (had told BMF about it), even though he showed no signs of interest at the time. (XH has a real poker face about those things.) …….So for the rest of the evening, I had the buttons undone….and when I was serving or receiving serve, I was bent over (like a tennis player) so XH could get a glimpse of cleavage…and then I held my paddle just in front of the area of interest (i.e. cleavage) so XH had to look there. ☺ Initially I could see XH eyeing my cleavage a few times, so that made me smile (XH is a che$t man and I can tell from FB photos that GF#2 isn’t as well-endowed as I am so I worked this angle) but then he acted as if he wasn’t paying attention……however, I know from our convos when we first started dating that H/XH didn’t look like he was checking me out on our early dates, but he really was.

In the course of the evening I did some stretching (touching my elbows behind my back), bent over many times to pick up balls (as you suggested Rabbit ☺ ), rotated my hips back and forth in a little dance before I served, applied lip gloss to bring attention to my lips, patted XH on the butt with my paddle several times when he won games,……….and bent over on all fours with my back arched looking for lost balls under a little table in the room. At one point when I was on all fours, XH said to me “You look like a dog”. ;-)……….interesting comment……….. At the end of the evening he talked about how he now wears a cap when he sits in his backyard hot tub in the nude……so maybe my flirting WAS having an effect on him?

Throughout the evening XH kept acting like he was being chaste (the MLC script. UGH!!!!!!!!) but he never acted annoyed that I was flirting with him……..but then I remembered that that’s the way he acted the evening we had our first advanced TT lesson. He was always hard to read that way. As we were getting into our cars XH said “wanna play again next week?” I said “the community center is closed then. We could play after Dec 26th”. XH didn’t say anything after that. XH gave me a perfunctory hug. I said “Merry Christmas” and we got in our cars and drove away. No firm TT date for the future..........so I'm thinking about trying to find someone else to play TT with, for my mental health (the fun and just being with someone who acts like they aren't holding you at arms length --- this is just annoying!) and to give XH something to think about.

I’m planning to visit X-MIL this weekend and on Christmas Day. Went to visit last night but she was asleep, so left some holiday goodies and two poinsettias. I think I’m going to print some nice photos of X-MIL and XH to leave at X-MILs the next time I visit. She will like them and when XH visits, they will remind him of some happy times when we were together.

GAG

Hi GAG,

I think your evening went quite well. Great job on the flirting

I always feel it is very difficult and somewhat awkward to re-connect after a dry spell. I think this is simply what you experienced last night.

Your XH might be right about BMF. Now that BMF sees you as out of XH's life you are fair game in his opinion. I would not tread there for a second. I know from your posts, you won't. I think it would be best for you not to mention BMF to XH again. I am wondering if the thoughts XH had could have put a damper on his mood and turned his thoughts to that issue and less on you and the game. (?)

Your flirting gave XH a vision of your fun side. I am quite positive that XH is still thinking about your evening. You planted some seeds....that is a good thing!!

I would schedule a TT game for as soon as you can with XH after the 25th and tell XH as soon as possible about it. Afterall he suggested another game... This is a great connection you two have, nurture it.

I have decided...I would rather be a friend with H rather than be an enemy. I am not going to close the door to our new-found, worked hard for friendship. Albeit, it's not my ideals...it's a better relationship than we had 5 years ago.

I see you and XH in the same place.

As Forrest Gump's Mama says...."Life is like a box of chocolates.............."

I like your photo idea for X-MIL. It will brighten her Christmas and please XH.

Hope your not as pressured today at the clinic....

Sanderika

Hi GAG,

I think that your evening with ex went very well...boy did you do a good job flirting LOL.

Don't be disappointed if you didn't see ex flirting back....you know that this may take time. I just remember what glamgirl said recently on my tread.....



Great idea for a gift for your X-MIL

Hey GAG,

Wow, lots of great suggestions from the ladies here. The interaction with your XH sounded good. Keep it up. I will translate one thing he said however.......



Translation......I would like to be nude in the hot tub with you.


Men don't talk about being in the nude as a rule, especially with a woman unless they are interested in being in the nude with that woman. The door was left wide open for you here.

Your response should have been.....maybe we can go check out the hot tub after Table Tennis?????

What do you have to lose???

You are going to have to initiate....

You said it...

We know it....

Now do it....

Got it???????

Oh yeah, stop talking about BMF.....he is a real A$$hole.

Any talk about him is only going to end up bad and take you in a direction you do not want to go......you found that out.

Sorry I am not around that much....new job and other extracurricular activity has me quite busy these days.

Merry Christmas to everyone!!!!!

Keep up the FLIRTING GAG!!!!!!

Cheers

I was thinking the same thing as Mila! Keep flirting with NO expectations!!!

And....what MHL said about the hot tub is very interesting! Nice to have a guys POV on these things! I would have NEVER gotten that!!!!

Definitley keep working it girl!!!