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Serenity,

I think I did ok. I did it to become empowered and let her know I am not going to stand by while she plays me for a fool.

I went to sons parent teacher conference and while waiting to go in she comes up full of solutions:
1. I (LBS) should move to my Dads house 30 minutes away.
I say NO you are the one leaving me, You need to move out.
2. She has a friend who just completed a divorce and we can do it uncontested for 500 retainer and 2700 dollars
I said - good make that appointment
3. She says I will take probably 50K for the house and get two cars (one is an antique Italian Car we brought from Italy)
I can keep my two trucks and the boat
I say Fine
4. She says, I am not moving out..
I say yes you are it is my house. She says it is "our" house.
5. I say you need to leave. She again says if she goes she is taking our son, I told her fine.
6. She says what about the dogs? I said you can have them

we go into teacher conf and as we walk out, I tell her "I am serious about you moving out. I want you out. I told her to make a list of stuff she wants and I will make a list also and we will wait until the 29th MC session before telling our son to get some guidance from MC.

I tell her before leaving, You need to leave the house and I want you out.

So that is where we left it.

Pen~


No, this isn't fine...Your son needs stability, to be in the house he knows, school he knows, friends he knows etc...

She wants out, fine, so be it, but the child stays unless the court says different.

The rest seems okay.

(((Hugs)))

Serenity,

I understand that and I am going to try to steer her to that conclusion but she is at the moment using him as her emotional crutch/pawn to keep me in the doormat phase, I just gave a little on that point to agree with her so she will have to think in complete terms of our sons welfare also. She is a GREAT mom.. and She is using her desperation because she knows I am an involved Dad.. she is trying to remain in the house.. ultimatly she also needs to face the consequences of being a single mom.. I am not going to "control" her anymore remember? She is a free willed person.

Pen~

This...



Is a contradiction to this...

Pen,

I'm sure you know this and I am not a lawyer, but be VERY careful that you:
1) Don't go on record as saying you don't want your son.
2) Say or DO ANYTHING that could even remotely be construed as threatening or violent.

I do not know the law, but my guess is that you cannot force her out, and if she can find a way to make it sound like you MIGHT become violent, you might be the one out of the house.

Not from, I sent her text just now with that very same thought. I told her I want her out but my Son will stay until she can show me a safe place for him to live.
I reaffirmed my original statement that I will not live in an open marriage and I want her out. She replied back "We are not in an open marriage, we seperated 30 Sept."

I am gonna let the text messages go..

Serenity,

good points I truly am past the controlling part. I am trying to let her go and damn if she isnt digging in tighter!

And Not so, I am not a violent person.. I am a lover not a fighter!

Pen~



Doesn't matter if you are or if you are not...

The WAS will do whatever they can to make you the crazy one while not rocking their little fantasy boat.

(((Hugs)))

I hear you.. I evidently shook her up though, she sent me an txt back telling me she is not in an open marriage we seperated on 30 September. So I am leaving that one alone,, I am not trying to argue with her and I dont want the CB.. she is reacting and this is more than I have gotten from her in 2 weeks..

Since I gave her freedom and her space.. why is she digging in so hard and not leaving?