As I look back on things, my H was in his MLC for about 5-6 years with the crisis coming to a head when he left in June to go live with OW. I left him alone, when we did talk, I was always kind, compassionate, and let him talk, and never pushed or asked questions. I read everything from Hearts Blessing, Snodderly, M-Go Blue, and Sting. I also read all the books they recommended to learn about depression and MLC BUT most of all I let go and let God. I became so close with my Lord and Savior, prayed continuously and He did the rest. My H started e-mailing me from Sept. til the day he came home and I just listened. You must learn forgiveness, you must learn about yourself and where changes need to be made and you must learn unconditional love. You must also realize and accept that this condition is really out of their control. My daughter had a terrific expression for this "an awake coma". My H does not remember everything he did, he just knows that he was not himself, and did not know any other way. Also, the OW was just an escape, he thought he cared but never really knew her and when he woke up he did not like her.
I know this is extremely difficult and you do hurt. But once I understood exactly what he was going thru, accepted what I needed to change in myself with the help of God, it made a big difference. May I recommend the site "Rejoice Marriage ministries" on the internet. They gave such support for standing for my marriage. When you said your vows to God they were sacred, and remember the vows of better or worse and in sickness and in health. This is those times.
May God Bless You and keep you strong. Muster every bit of strength you have...go to God, He will help you get thru this. Another person on the board who will help with your faith is Vinlad (Laurie)....she has got such Faith and still has not given up.
Happy Thanksgiving.....Hang in there and NEVER GIVE UP!!!!
I am so happy for you and so very encouraged that your H seems to be turning back to you. Just when we think that things are hopeless, we get some good news like your story and it helps us to keep on standing for our M.
Blessings to you and your family and may you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. ICBI
Thank you everybody for the congrats. You all were so helpful during that difficult time. It will be a beautiful holiday. As I have learned from God, never give up on Him, as He will answer your faithful prayers in his time.
TMAK, I was so happy to see the title of your thread and very happy to read about your h's coming home! Keep up the good work. I'm so glad you got an understanding of what they were going through by reading the books. The information really helps me to keep moving forward. I wish you a Happy Thanksgiving...the first of many holidays your h will be home for.
It is just the inspiration i needed today. Times have been really hard but to finally see another success story really helps to keep the faith to keep moving on.
I have been trying to hand this all over to god and it has been a great comfort. I would not have made it this far with out the wonderful caring friends i have made on this board. Everyone of you are true god sends and i hope that i will eventually be able to help others with the knowledge i have learned here.
I was lurking and trying to find a few things here, haven't been in the MLC section for ages. Then I found this thread! This is the path I'm also following. I find rejoice ministries to be of utmost help!
I just want others to know that I belive in what TMAK says! Funny how it is exactly what I've decided to do. Other than this post and my few times of lurking. I had bmade the decision to no longer post on my thread.
This was such an inspiration, I couldn't resist! Thanks JJ for bumpimg it up!
