Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers What am I supposed to do???

gr8 day 2B alive-It is absolutely possible that the baby is the old boyfriend's. In fact I honestly believe that the baby is the old boyfriend's. I feel like he has already hurt me so much so why not just say "OW had a baby by her ex boyfriend and I am going to take care of it". There would be nothing that I could do. He has already hurt me so much that would not be anything more to deal with. Instead of telling me the truth though he tells me a lie that he knows will devastate me. If in fact it is his baby I am still done either way. I am not going to lie though I do want the truth. I know that I will never get it though. Somebody is going to be saying something though when I name her in this divorce suit. I know that nameing her is not going to change anything but we are not divorcing because of irreconcilable differences. We are divorcing because he committed adultery and he had a baby and I am telling it all in the divorce. Thanks for your support.

Pinhead-you are always so supportive and I thank you for that. I know that my H thought that I was going to be all over him like I normally am. This is a new day and I am done forever with that man because he is not the H I once knew.

My mom asked me why was I not going to just file for an uncontested divorce instead of going through filing for adultery? I told her because I would never ever file for divorce but he has crossed a line that he can't come back from. I am going to name the OW in the divorce, tell about the baby they had, and give them all the evidence that I have kept of text messages and all in the last 7 months. What do you all think about that? Should I file uncontested or on grounds of adultery?

I say file on grounds of adultery. He made this bed, let him lay in it, so to speak. I know it seems vindictive, but hell, you deserve something and that's for everyone to know that it wasn't differences that couldn't be worked out.

I may just be a vindictive b^tch though.

Tay,

I think your handled your H really well. It's ridiculous that he expects you to be friendly to him after all this BS. Do what you feel is best.

My heart goes out to you. Stay strong for your kids. You deserve so much better and you are worth diamonds

KellBell0820-I agree with you about filing for divorce on the grounds of adultery. They did not care about my feelings why should I care about theirs.

soleil-Thank you so much for the support. It means so much me.

Go for adultry. That's what I am doing.

40andsadintexas-that is what I am going to do. I just got off the phone with a Private Investigator. They gave me the rate of $850 for 12 hours of investigation. Is that a good rate? They will be doing video and picture survelliance (sp?). Also following paper trails. I know they are together but I don't have any evidence of it to show in court. I also don't actually know if the baby is his so that alone I can't use in court.

I have got 90% of my info strait from facebook, I have taken pictures of 3 om cars parked at my house at 2-3:00 am in the morning with pics of the tags cars and the owners name just so happens it matches names my kids have given me. My kids have talked to my lawyer and d10 told him she would talk to the judge. I have not used a pI my lawyer said we did not need one.

40andsadintexas-I am going to talk to my lawyer as well. I have my first meeting on 10/6/10. The thing about my situation is my H says that he is with the OW but the OW says that they are not together. They live together and the light bill is in his name but we don't have pictures of this information.

If you need a PI let your lawyer set it up. You can keep your hands cleaner that way. I took the pictures of om cars at my house from the street I have a wonderful digital slr that takes pics as good as any pi. I really think your lawyer handling it is the way to go. He might get you a better price any way

40andsadintexas-thank you for the advice I am going to take it.