I am so happy for you right now, bro'. I take my hat off to you for your unbelievable patience and diligence. Such a long trying road with many, many leagues through the desert to now achieve your dream. The draught is at an end at last! Let the rains fall!
But NOW the real "patience" Starts. Yes she opened the door and let me in. But now again is a critical time. I would so much like to "throw a party" but If I get too crazy she will think "what have I done?" Who is this guy? I feel like I went back in time... Three years to be exact, like a "do over". I had some things to do in the morning and left wife asleep. Then that feeling of awkward ness...like when you meet someone at a party and slept with them...how you feel the next morning when you had to face them...... But I put on my “As if” hat again and just acted like nothing has changed. I did not want to go back to the clingy Doc I used to be. (Had a typo there first wrote “clingy Dic” but that would have worked also). IT’s not over yet... Then again I guess it is never really over. It will always be work to keep a marriage exciting and re charged… Got ta get to school… Later Doc
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
You're right Doc - there is plenty more work ahead of you, and you don't want to come on too strong and scare her off. But on the other hand - what a terrific step in the right direction!
Makes my day just to hear about it! HIGH FIVE!
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
Things are still going great in “Doc’s house” Have not had a repeat of that night... but hey I wasn’t expecting it that night either. I think that analogy I used to explain my “as if” to CL is a good one. You know the wild cat one. AND I used it again the day after...you see the wild cat got comfortable around me and even jumped up in my lap. AND by not holding it there and making a big deal about it I am sure it will know that it is safe to be around me and it will happen again. Tonight after I got back from MIL house I told wife “I know you went to curves today and had your exercise but I thought it would be nice to go for a walk “(little conversation before we had about her feeling overweight and being unattractive…I figured I could get her to excises without telling her to by going for a walk WITH ME) She smiled and said “but the bachelorette starts in a few minutes and I don’t want to miss it” I told her that’s Ok... I just thought it would be nice to start going on walks after dinner while the weather is nice. She said “That would be nice. Let’s start tomorrow”
I am on a roll…………..
JoJo and the others that have my E-mail… If you want to hear a longer version about what lead up to that “other night” drop me an E-mail…. It was a series of events that just lead up to things working out...Almost like we were being guided by a higher power…if ya know what I mean
You need my love baby oh so bad You're not the only one I've ever had And if I say I wanna set you free Don't you know you'll be in misery They call me Doctor Love They call me Doctor Love (Calling Doctor Love) I've got the cure you're thinkin' of (Calling Doctor Love) And even though I'm full of sin In the end you'll let me in You'll let me through, there's nothin' you can do You need my lovin' don't you know it's true So will you please get on your knees There are no bills, there are no fees Baby I know what your problem is The first step of the cure is a KISS
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Well it's been over a week and W is still in our bed. Last night before bed W told me I was starting to "grind my teeth" So last night I wore my mouth gaurd.(which I hate) anyway about 2 am I hear wife calling out to me. "Doc (not my real name) help me Doc"..She was sleeping.. I said "I'm here don't worry what do you want me to do?" she then woke up and said she had a bad dream about the racoons in our yard had gotten into the house. "I said no worries I'm here to protect you...."
She was dreaming about ME....
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Well no "replay" yet of the other night but things is really good. I can see W is getting more at ease around me. She was talking to me about going to yoga and maybe joining this kind of spiritual group. Now it's not religion but like a meditation / self centering group. I think this is also a big step for W becasue she always refused to try any self help books or self improvement things. Even though I am a little worried about money and she does need to go get a job. I did encourage her to go. I did ask if it was a male female group becasue she heard about it at her "curves" gym. (An all female gym). I asked becasue I thought this would be a great way for US to do something together. She said she thinks so but they meet in the morning. This is too bad because I am in school at that time. Last night during the night I did put my arm around her and cuddled a little but it was hot (temp wise) so not for long. I have to be really careful right now because I know I am my own worst enemy. I need to NOT assume any negative things. Some people are telling me that If I had exposed the A three years ago I would have saved me this entire wait. She may have come back to me sooner but then again I figure that if I had exposed it then it may have been over sooner with her leaving me. NOT to mention that since it seems like we are working things out… I do not have to explain anything to family or friends why I took her back. I figure it took 19 years of marriage to screw things up… it took three years to get back on track.. And hopefully will only take one year to rebuild
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
