Maybe another way to ask it, Robx, is... "Did you show love and appreciation to him in his home...using his LL?"
ok. that i think i can answer. i think his ll is gifts and physical touch. although i never knew about the 5 LLs, i always tried all five on him - maybe a little less on the words LL.
his parents were always big on giving gifts so i think that's how i picked up on the gifts thing but i have to admit, i took it as being materialistic (ie. the more expensive/lavish the gift, the more ll points i'd get). near the end, i stopped giving and i stopped intimacy. i stopped touching him as well. he used to say how me rubbing his forearm had a very calming effect on him.
but when he hurt me with his words, i stopped those things. i often felt he didn't reciprocate and speak my ll which was qt and pt. and when my love tank went empty, i had little to give as well.
there was little reassurance from h that i was a priority to him. little things he'd say, were always about how important his parents were to him. how he felt responsible for them. how he worried about them constantly. how he felt he needed to be there for them. it wasn't on one or two occasions. it was constant. and i felt so invisible.
i gave so much at christmas, and the tank went empty. i couldn't do it anymore. and even then, i didn't want a d. i wanted to work things out. to find a happy medium. we needed to address the issue of his parents. but it was too late. he felt i had embarrassed him in front of his parents with my behaviour. so that was it.
