MWD has a list of things to look for in a good FT too... this first session should be trated like a job interview.. because IT IS.. YOu are hiring THEM to WORK for YOU...
You need to hit them with a lot of questions... look at what books they have on their shelf, etc...
Ask them what infidelity experts they ahve read... don't give them any hints... see what names they can come up with just on thier own...
If they don't mention Harley or Glass just walk out
This is an excellent (and brief) interview with Shirley Glass, she's an infidelity researcher... (died in 2004). She's researched infidelity for over twenty years... twenty years hard data crunched by this woman...
This is the first piece I read of hers, after i read this I had to read the whole book... She has only published the one book Not Just Friends
I believe she has a DVD available with a workshop as well...
It's great info to protect yoru marriage from infidelity... Don't think people who don't have infidleity in their home shouldn't read this text.. EVERY couple wanting to protect their marriage and keep it safe from third party violation need to read her book...
I was VERY happy with the counselor! Not only did she know all 3 books, but said she recommends these very ones. She was on the exact same page, philosophically too. She also believes it is not her job to be "secret keeper". In other words, if there is an A and H tells her, she will expect him to come clean. She feels secrets destroy marriages and all the same things we've discussed. She was GREAT. I hope H's appt. goes well tonight although, I guess I won't ask him about it unless he offers up that information. I'm kinda nervous and I'm not sure why. Maybe because I know things can get worse before they get better at times...