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Journaling...

Sat was busy, doc appt, oil change on the truck, mow the lawns, fix the broken sprinklers (damn mower), pick up the house, grocery shopping, laundry etc. Kept me busy all day...

Sun, well...woke up in a down mood. Had dreams about DD getting sick etc, I should refrain from reading BBJ's posts before going to bed So naturally started missing DD but wanted to stay strong and not call STBX. Low and behold the phone rings and it's DD!!! DD never really calls me when she's with STBX, so awesome, we talked for a bit, she told me how they were going to the beach and then the museum. I hate how I have to miss so many of her growing up moments, I'll only be involved in 50% of them at best...In the words of Kelly Clarkson 'I would never wish bad things, but I don't wish you well STBX'

The rest of the day was blah...tried to cook a steak on the new George Foreman grill I got (after hearing rave reviews about it) but it cooked it too much...oh well couldn't let it go to waste so ate it with lots of BBQ sauce and coke...so healthy, I know lol

Then tried to experiment with the apple fries...I think I'll keep my day job

Dinner+Netflix movie tonight- something to look forward to. I think I'm going to make breakfast for dinner: pancakes and eggs...easy.

Trying to figure out what to do the next few weekends, will also have DD for a week when STBX is out of town mid Jul.

Still have the disclosure/interrogatory docs to work on...don't feel like dealing with it as is and her attorney's asking for docs from 2005 and 2007. Like could she make this any harder?

Various thoughts about the future pop in my head every now and then including the fear of staying single for a long time if not forever. I stopped by REI the other day for no reason and noticed several young families buying stuff for their upcoming camping/vacations as I wandered the store alone...another reminder of what I've lost and how much I loved those times.

How heavy is your house? I hope you were careful and used proper lifting techniques otherwise you could have gotten a hernia!

wii, it's not bad...I live in a Lego house

So after 6 days of silence she spoke via email:


I can make it Wed or Thu. Has to be after 6 because I get out of work at 530 and have to pick up DD and bring her home and wait for [roommate] to get home too.


I'll tell her Wed will work for me. Not sure how to act when she gets here. I'm afraid I'll have an involuntary muscle spasm which will make me sweep her off her feet and carry her into the bedroom...NOT!!

OK guys, thought I'd share a book that might be helpful to a lot of us single dads who are not used to a lot of the stuff the wives used to take care of. Or in my case a refresher and to watch for things to come in the future.

I just ordered it after reading the sample content, it seems promising and I liked the format of the book very much. Easy to digest, bite sized topics.

The complete single father

I responded to her very briefly "Wed works for me". Her response this morning:

"Ok, I'll be over around 6ish on Wednesday. We should also talk about DD's birthday party. She said she wants it at xyz (the place with the bunnies and guinea pigs) I can research to see what it will cost and maybe if thats ok we can split it?"

The correct response is:

1. Why not go through the lawyers for this too?
2. You want to celebrate her b.day really? from your actions that seems contradictory...
3. Fine but I don't want anyone at the party that has been supporting you in your decision. It's just wrong for them to be present at DD's b.day party when they're lending you support in breaking up her family and destroying her future
4. Whatever you say your highness
5. All of the above
6. None of the above

10 points for the correct answer?

I would be tempted to tell her that you have already made plans for you and your daughter for her b-day. If your W wants to do something she needs to plan (and pay for it) on her own.

I am sure that is the wrong answer, lol!

What can I buy for 10 points?

correct response is some version of the following.

X date works for me for a party. I will send you a list of people I think should be invited. Please send me your list as well.

Given our current situation, I prefer to have the party somewhere more affordable (our house, xyz park). Please let me know the cost of the party when you find out and do not commit to paying anything for this location until you and I have discussed and agree on the cost and date.

The important question here is do you want to celebrate DD's birthday with your STBX? You need to decide what you are comfortable with. Set your boundary.

Respectfully, I would recommend doing whatever is best for DD, putting aside whether he wants to be with STBXW or not, and which, if I know him, is having both parents present at her birthday party, as long as he's up to it (which I know he is, despite having frequent daydreams of punching her) .