Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis MLC, H and me

CW,

You're doing better than you think. You don't feel strong, but the strength in your posts come through loud and clear.

Don't worry about having heard nothing from your lawyer about divorce proceedings..if your husband wants this badly enough, he can get the ball rolling...you can sit idly by and do nothing.

I was reading along about having trouble with Weed Eaters and such, remembering when my husband first started trucking around 20 years ago.

I was on my own most of the time, and I knew NOTHING about what he usually did around the house...but I LEARNED and quickly how to take care of everything on my own..including fixing a leak under the sink, changing a few flats on the car, and what I could NOT do, I always knew someone to call.

It takes time, but you'll ALL get it, given time.

It's tough when you've never had to deal with stuff before.

It's an accomplishment, though, when you learn to survive without a man to do the heavy stuff.

I remember the first time I was fixing a flat on my car..I jacked it up, and the car fell off the jack...I can't remember how old son was at the time, but he suggested I call somebody...made me mad, and I got back into it, jacked that car up correctly the second time, got out the lug wrench, fitted it, stood on and hopped up and down on it to get it to loosen the lugs one at a time, jacked car right on up changed the tire, tightened the lugs the SAME way I'd loosened them; all the while son was laughing at me hopping up and down on the lug wrench, LOL!!

But I got'er done, and took the tire in to have it fixed.

Husband called later that day, laughed at my story, but said he was proud of me for figuring it all out.

You can do whatever you put your mind to, and that's a fact.

Have a good one.

Hi nlt and HB! Thanks! I don't know why my stomach did that...I know this is happening. I just am hoping for peaceful and not fighting back and forth and so far that is how it has been...sure hope that it gets a little easier everytime I have to talk to the L...it is never easy if it is not what you want.

HB...I am sure driving OTR that you had to learn how to do many things. When I was younger and cars were simpler, I did know how to change the oil and check fluids etc.

One time in college, my roomate had a flat tire so I told her that we could change it. Well, we stupidly put the jack right in front of the tire instead of under the bumper..bent the wheel well and of course we could not remove the tire. Luckily, a car load of guys drove by and came to ur rescue but boy did we feel stupid...am sure they got a good laugh for the rest of the day!!!

Everyone have a great day!!!

Hi CW & HB,

Both those stories are funny about the tires!! But I agree with HB, you learn to do stuff you always depended on H to do. I fixed a toilet & leaky sink! I was thrilled with myself. I really don't have the money to call someone to fix things so it's like you said HB, you do what you have to do.

I agree with you on the stomach thing, you want peace & mine was not peace either. My ex got so mad at me b/c I countered him & went for the house, he never dreamed I would do that, he cused me out one night. (I had a tape recorder under my shirt & got it on tape). I think that is what helped me the house, plus the fact that he had ow.

I also agree with HB, I think you are doing great & are a lot stronger than you realize!!

(((HUGS)))

Hi CW - just stopping by to say hi and to tell you how much I appreciate all of your support on my tread.

You are doing so good, despite the L involvement...that's not easy.

Be strong (((hugs)))

My first road trip with my very first car the oil light came on and I had no clue where the heck to put it. Another driver stopped by and saw me scratching my head and tried to help.. but he couldn't figure it out either (very old car.. before intermittent wipers were introduced). It took a guy on a bicycle to come by, look at both of us in disgust, point to where it went and ride off to figure it out!

Eva Gabor (or was it Zsa Zsa?) once said:

"My husband taught me Housekeeping. When he divorced me, I kept the house!"

lol!

Thanks nlt!

Mila...you are doing good too! Hang in there!

DG...LOL!!!!

Those Gabor sisters knew what they were doing WN!

CW I know I posted SOOOOO much on my thread today (lots of brain dumping I guess) but have come to this conclusion: IF our husbands (all of us) go through with the divorce, then we are divorcing the alien husbands.

I want my earthling husband (har har!)-- the man I married, to return to me! And based on what I know and believe about him, I am confident he will one day!

I share this on your thread as comfort (hopefully) if you end up divorcing your H before he ends his A. Do you see my point? You would be divorcing your MLC H not the man you married....and from what I have gleaned about you from your posts, you are waaaaaay too valuable for him to give up forever! A sparkly, valuable, one of a kind gem!

Yet I don't see divorce coming soon to you unless you choose it.

Hey NM! I read your thread today and you have been doing a lot of thinking! I truly think that if your H doesn't wake up...he will lose the best thing that ever happened to him besides your S!!!!

Thankyou for saying this...

"You would be divorcing your MLC H not the man you married....and from what I have gleaned about you from your posts, you are waaaaaay too valuable for him to give up forever! A sparkly, valuable, one of a kind gem!"

Since H is the one that filed, he will have to be the one to stop it! Time will tell!

Hi CW, yes he will be the one to have to stop the D but you just be still & wait for him to make the move.

NM, "I want my earthling husband (har har!)-- the man I married, to return to me! And based on what I know and believe about him, I am confident he will one day!"

I have always felt the same way & still do even tho he has m'd ow, I still think I will see him again, I could be so wrong. But I like what you said - I did d an alien, he was not himself & I told him that the night he cussed me out. I asked him what happened to the man I married, he didn't have an answer.

CW, you are doing great!
((((HUGS))))