I do like your approach on the doctor bit. But he is also really bad about not making any kind of calls. What if I asked if he has thought about seeing the doctor and then if he says yes I offer to either give him the phone number or make the call for him?
We have natural gas and the only two gas items in the house are the furnace which has been on for a few weeks now so shouldn't be it and that new fireplace I had installed and it is supposed to have some sort of built in sensor on it so that if it has a problem it shuts itself down.
That is why now I am sort of thinking it surely isn't gas. Just not sure what is causing it and I wish it were warmer so I could open the windows and air the house out today.
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just to be safe I would call your local gas company anyway. Do you have oil heat or propaine heat or natural gas? depending on wich one you would (I assume) call or rule out different things. You don't neccessarily need to call your own gas co. but I think just to be safe you should have it checked out. better safe than sorry.
hey wait a min...didn't I just treat you the way I told you not to treat david?
LL
Ok, clue for me into the way I think I guess. I did not take what you just said as controlling at all I took it as expressing an opinion or suggestion and concern. So how do you know the difference? I think that is where I really get myself into trouble.
Not sure how to go about dbing her exactly! LOL
Definitely giving the rodeo idea some thought. She had called me Thursday night about the horse show yesterday. It is pretty big show and held in the coliseum at the KY State Fairgrounds. I have shown in it once or twice years ago! The guy who rode my horses for years mom said was there yesterday and he and his wife asked about me and told her to load me up and bring me down sometime.
I guess I just feel awkward going out and about right now. Except with my really close friends who know what is going on with David. That was one of the reasons I didn't try to take off work and go with her yesterday. Plus going to a show that I have shown at and my horses have been shown at before I was afraid would make me miss my horses. Just being home and not going to any shows I am not missing them too bad. But think I need more time to be ready to hit the shows they used to go too so that they don't upset me.
Why am I embarrassed? Because this is my second marriage and I feel like I failed when David filed for D and walked out on me?
Not sure on my answer to that one.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
I do like your approach on the doctor bit. But he is also really bad about not making any kind of calls. What if I asked if he has thought about seeing the doctor and then if he says yes I offer to either give him the phone number or make the call for him? still I would leave it alone and let him take care of himself
We have natural gas and the only two gas items in the house are the furnace which has been on for a few weeks now so shouldn't be it and that new fireplace I had installed and it is supposed to have some sort of built in sensor on it so that if it has a problem it shuts itself down. might not be working properly...I'd keep a nose on it and if you're still smelling it or concerend then start calling.
That is why now I am sort of thinking it surely isn't gas. Just not sure what is causing it and I wish it were warmer so I could open the windows and air the house out today.
Quote:
just to be safe I would call your local gas company anyway. Do you have oil heat or propaine heat or natural gas? depending on wich one you would (I assume) call or rule out different things. You don't neccessarily need to call your own gas co. but I think just to be safe you should have it checked out. better safe than sorry.
hey wait a min...didn't I just treat you the way I told you not to treat david?
LL
Ok, clue for me into the way I think I guess. I did not take what you just said as controlling at all I took it as expressing an opinion or suggestion and concern. So how do you know the difference? I think that is where I really get myself into trouble. here's a thought...men and women are very different (ok I know people are different) when I go out...I like it when h calls me however when h goes out my calling him is sometimes taken as controling or intrusive..so it's a fine line to walk..why not just follow davids lead on things for a while don't make offers to do things or do things for him unless he asks.
Not sure how to go about dbing her exactly! LOL answer the phone in an up beat manner and not allow her to drag you into conversations about the misery stories she hears...just let her get it out say oh that's sad and then move on to something positive even if it's hey I watered my plants today.
Definitely giving the rodeo idea some thought. She had called me Thursday night about the horse show yesterday. It is pretty big show and held in the coliseum at the KY State Fairgrounds. I have shown in it once or twice years ago! The guy who rode my horses for years mom said was there yesterday and he and his wife asked about me and told her to load me up and bring me down sometime.
I guess I just feel awkward going out and about right now. Except with my really close friends who know what is going on with David. sometimes it's best to be around those that don't know what's going on then ya can't wallow That was one of the reasons I didn't try to take off work and go with her yesterday. Plus going to a show that I have shown at and my horses have been shown at before I was afraid would make me miss my horses. Just being home and not going to any shows I am not missing them too bad. But think I need more time to be ready to hit the shows they used to go too so that they don't upset me. is there anyway you can get involved with hourses without having your own? I volunteered once at a horse farm.
Why am I embarrassed? Because this is my second marriage and I feel like I failed when David filed for D and walked out on me? life is life and there's no reason to be embarrassed about it. If people wanna judge or look at you funny just give 'em one a these
Yes, I like that, follow his lead and if he asks for info on doctor I will give it to him. Or anything else going on right now. This way I am MUCH LESS likely to come across controlling even if I don't feel I am trying to be controlling at all.
On the other side he also claims I am selfish and don't do things for him. So a very fine line to try to do acts of service without being controlling.
Well, cool that is pretty much what I try to do with mom now when she brings up sad stuff. It is just that even hearing it sometimes it sticks in my head.
I think next summer I will be more ready to be at horse shows again. My niece will probably be showing again and I am the official mane bander. So I should hit a few shows and possibly the girls that have our horses will get them out some and maybe I will be ready to go see them doing something other than standing around in my barn. I really didn't like them not doing something. It sort of gives me a good feeling now knowing they are not bored and have stuff to keep them occupied now.
Well, Zoo said she wished she could give me thicker skin! Guess I just need to work on it.
So hey hope you have a good time. Don't want to post on your thread and fill it up anymore.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Hi Pam. So even if it is cold out - crack your windows a bit to get some fresh air in the house. Look in the phone book under gas company and call them - they can tell you if you are a customer or not. Or go look on the meter on the side of your house - their name and number are likely on it. Better safe than sorry. And if it is a gas issue, you should not use the phone (especially cell) as they can throw an electric spark in the air and ka-boom!
I will also second the suggestion of buying a carbon monoxide detector for each level of your home. CO is a colorless, odorless gas that can kill. Most people get drowsy, go to bed and never wake up. A good detector will run $35 - $50 or so, plug in and have a battery back-up.
Was last night the first time you used your fireplace this season? Call the company that installed it and ask them if an off-gasing occurs with the first use. If not, it should be under warranty and they can send someone to check to see that it is working properly. Sensors break or are defective too sometimes.
You are right in keeping an eye on the Shelties as they do have sensitive noses, but also listen to your body.
Well, it seems like you made a list of things to do this weekend. I am not sure if you are accepting my challenge, but since my back is killing me, I won't be doing the playroom this weekend after all. I do however, plan on keeping up with the flylady ideas and some other light projects around here.
Keep checking things off your list and you will feel great!
Hey - I bought Nemo too - the kids have already watched it 2 or 3 times. It is such a great movie - look for the fun references to Toy Story in it too. And if you haven't seen that - add it to your rental list. Let's see....Lion King, Toy Story, Finding Nemo....all you need is a fire and some popcorn - and David! You can have a marathon!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
Thank you for checking in on me. So far pretty good, hope to stay that way the rest of the weekend!!
I may go with mom, told her to check back and let me know what night she is thinking of going. She didn't know yet today when I talked to her.
Hi totite,
I think I will open the windows just a bit, I believe the smell is getting better or I am just getting used to it.
I have really considered the carbon monoxide detectors before but thinking a lot more seriously about them now.
I have had the fireplace on several times this year already and I think I may have figured it out. Experimenting now to see if I have found the cause or not.
I don't think I took you up on your challenge yet. I wanted to see if I could just get myself moving enough to clean the house this weekend before tackling anything major. Shoot getting it cleaned back up is major!
I read your description on the painting you are doing and I want you to come and help me experiment!! I am not that brave on my own.
What would look good in the shelties room? It is a medium blue right now and only has one window. It is dark seeming in that room with only the one window though so would like it lighter but don't want white walls in there for them to get dirty! I suppose if you were good at it you could keep fading the blue lighter as you go up higher and it might lighten the room up?
Hey, I did mention to David that I have a list of some movies and he said ok, but he never seems to be going to get well to where he even feels like coming over. He is in bed today and I think has mostly been in bed since he left work yesterday.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Checking to see how you are doing today?! I know how you feel about your mother, my mother ONLY sees the negative, NEVER the positive. She cries alot complains about everything. She can find something that is every bit positive and find something negative about it! She IS the most depressing person I know! I try to Db her but even that doesn't work. I'm trying SO hard not to be like her!
I'd open my windows a crack if I was you! Gas is nothing to mess with!
It's a beautiful, sunny day here, it did get a little colder and it is really going to get COLD tonight. But I have my 2 woodburners to keep it nice and toasty in here!
It's a good day here! Hope it helps boost you up! Thanks so much for supporting me yesterday! I'll never forget it!
Yes, the time stamp on this is correct. I'm posting probably just about when you're rolling over and thinking about getting up!!!
We had fun tonight...just water for me...had to drive CJ's sis and BIL home, and then us...trying to unwind...
Hope your Sunday dawns bright and crisp...surely you still have some decent walking weather where you're at?...still freezing out and snow on the ground here.
I have decided this is something that happens on a regular basis and I wanted to get some input on it.
To me this is simply being rude, but I wasn't brought up with proper manners and all that and David was, so this could be something I have in my head that is all wrong.
Yesterday morning he called in regards to the gas message I had left on his cell phone Friday night. He felt really awful and I said I really hope you feel better soon I am starting to worry about you a bit. He joked a tad that he is getting better so I said ok I won't worry.
He was going back to bed. Then that afternoon he called just to let me know he was feeling better as I had said I was a bit worried that morning. I thought that was really nice of him.
I asked him if he was going to ride over and see if he had any ideas on the smell and he said maybe he was going to get off the phone go to the bathroom and finish waking up.
He really never gives definite answers most of the time. Bunny says he doesn't at work either! So at least I know it isn't just me. I think it is a defense mechanism he learned dealing with his mom to shut her up and out.
Anyway this was a maybe that sounded more like a yes than a no. I know my ASSumption. I never heard back from him at all. Not last night to say he really didn't feel like coming over or at all today.
He had also said he would look at the microwave as it has stopped working. Their goes my microwave dinners!
But to me as he indicated fairly strongly he might come over the polite thing to do is to call back if you aren't going to make it and let the other person know this information. Do I have this wrong?
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
No I don't think you have it wrong. But I also didn't get as clear a sense as you did that he WAS leaning toward coming over.
My take on his answer to you that morning was that he DIDN'T appreciate being hit with a request/suggestion to come over before he'd had a chance to wake up properly.
Recall that this was one of the very things CJ HATED about my communication timing...I'd bring up issues or things that needed doing before he'd had a chance to greet the day...
These are key to communication: Timing AND agreeing on what is expected.
I'll wager that David felt he had made no committment to coming over and thus no follow up call was needed.
You however would have appreciated KNOWING one way or the other.
Would it be possible for you to perhaps send David a well worded e-mail (which you vet here first of course! ) that goes something like this:
Hello David...
I have some ideas for how we can improve one aspect of our communications.
I realize that bringing up problems first thing in the morning is probably NOT how you want to start your day.
When might be a better time for me to raise such issues?
Also, I know that you are not feeling well and very busy with work, but I would really appreciate even a brief message as to whether you are coming by or not on a given day...especially after a request such as the potential gas problem, or with dog food, etc.
I PROMISE that I will not drag you into a long discussion at the time that you call (and you MUST live up to this Pam!!). It would just help me a lot to plan my day and not wonder.
So I should hit a few shows and possibly the girls that have our horses will get them out some and maybe I will be ready to go see them doing something other than standing around in my barn. I really didn't like them not doing something. It sort of gives me a good feeling now knowing they are not bored and have stuff to keep them occupied now. 
Don't want to post on your thread and fill it up anymore. 
So far pretty good, hope to stay that way the rest of the weekend!!
So at least I know it isn't just me. I think it is a defense mechanism he learned dealing with his mom to shut her up and out. 
) that goes something like this: