Divorcebusting.com Forums Divorcebusting.com Archives Surviving the Big D Archives Just found out she already filed

Thanks guys! were you all vacationing at the same time?

Well I don't have any plans on bringing up any R talk but if it goes that way I will let her know that I'm done. Maybe I'm reading robx and gucci's posts lately but I have a feeling she's having EA/PA. For her to move out and within a week file for D etc and having an A last time too (though she claimed she only had a PA once) all points to it and I feel like it's all over. I just have to come out of the denial and move forward...easier said than done.

Yesterday around 12:30p she called my cell saying "we just got back and wanted to know if you were taking DD to the girl scout thing - you don't have to." I said "yeah I was going to take her for a little bit, not the whole time". Her: "oh ok, do you want me to meet you guys there or are you taking her by yourself, I mean either way is fine". Me: "yeah I'm fine taking her by myself". Her: "ok", Me: "ok, bye".

So we get there and a little bit later another mom tapped me on the shoulder saying "oh we're over here...by the me and STBXW just pulled in at the same time" Me: "oh I didn't realize you went to the biking trip with her" Her: "yeah that's me, I'm her sping instructor too" Me: "oh i c" - I'd only met her once before.

Last night DD called her and she was at her "studying partner's house" - who's apparently this other lady. But I'm starting to doubt everything she says and does. She's not the woman I thought she was. I feel like if a woman did for me half of what I've done for her I'd never leave, hurt or be dis-honest to...ever.

Oh the upside, I had a great time hanging out with DD. We did a lot of fun stuff together. She didn't want to call STBXW last night either but I kinda made her by dialing the number and handing the phone to her.

Another blow this morning...L said 'application for temp orders just came in' - anyone know what this is or means?

I don't know what it means- he should explain it to you- he didn't when you talked?

Hang in there- like FM, am still waiting for GAL plans- particularly once DD leaves town tomorrow.

(((SR)))

She is probably filing to get a temporary order for child or spousal support if you do not have anything in writing yet. It am also cover cutody if that is not formal yet.

Thanks Alice, Suzy!

Well, he sent me an email and when I asked for explanation he said he's in court today so I'll have to wait for another day for an explanation. ugh!

Yes. I had this a couple of weeks ago. It's to get something entered on custody, child support.

I dreaded it and showed up and we ended up not having a hearing because we set a settlement conference for this Friday. I'm hoping -- probably in vain -- to never have to appear in court with the STBXW.

Do you have any formal agreements yet, Or is it all verbal agreements between you?

Suzy, nothing in legal writing yet.

These bombs just don't ever hit with less damage. I just feel deflated even though I know this is what I HAVE to do and it's just part of the process but all kinds of thoughts come rushing in like imagining STBXW as some alien laughing away and planning her second marriage etc.

I'm in the midddle of an important project at work and I just can't concentrate. Keep wanting to be with DD or just with someone!

I finally got the courage to look at the long document.

Suzy, is the temporary order only for the 6 month mandatory separation period? In other words can this be changed easily for the final divorce? Do I have to pay the spousale support before the divorce is final?

I think every state is different. I do know from hearing others discuss it here that temporary often gets rolled to permanent. Don't agree to anything you won't want to live with regarding support or custody. I beleive you will start paying the support as soon as the order is set.