A repeating pattern for you two it seems. Peace settles in, you reach out in a positive way to each other, she responds negatively at some point sending each of you in your separate directions.
Of course, if you find yourself able to see the bigger picture and thereby remove your personal feelings from the matter, I'm sure that goodwill is being earned by these visits.
And if you are not able...then you should not do.
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
Bill, I think you're both still acting like a married couple. Hooking stuff up for her in her apt.--you shouldn't be doing that. Or cooking for her or watching movies. And she shouldn't be commenting on what kind of milk you purchase or anything else like that. You need to detach. I think that would solve a lot of your problems and bring you more peace as well....
So, over the past week, I've moved back into the house, bought some things for the house, moved furniture around, cleaned it up, got new rugs, stuff like that. And involving the boys in purchacing all these things, asking what they like, etc. I did the baskets for Easter, set up an egg hunt in the house, etc.
I saw W yesterday, having dropped the boys off and picked them up while I did some shopping.
W came over today and we had a family Easter. Now keep in mind, she's been sick much of the week, and is getting used to her new apartment.
So at one point, she says - I wish there was some way we could work this out.
OK...
So we talked. Much of the same ground. And we discussed that we're going to put off signing the papers.
I'm not going to get excited about it, not even going to call it "second thoughts." She says she can't let go. Yeah, that's old news. She says that she thought she'd want to be out there, moving on, but she doesn't want to be with anyone else.
I asked her about OM, and she said she thought she was in love, but was just lonely, and that there's nothing there, though she doesn't expect me to trust her on that since she lied before.
She still says she loves me.
So, for the moment - we're putting it off. But we've been here before, and I'm not sure it means much.
So - yes - the big question you're all going to ask. What do I want? Yes, if it was workable, I'd work on putting it back together. I have no confidence though in anything other than, she's really sad right now and trying to cope with having moved out, and is feeling confused.
OK, my boys are asking to spend time with me, gotta go.
So, just keep doing what you are doing as far as getting your house and life back on track. Hopefully she will want to join in but if you dont want that then I guess you end it. From the way you write I think you still love her though.
Me 35 Wife 34 Two daughters 8 years and 3 years Bomb 3/30/09 W filed 4/16/09 We met in'92 married in 2000 Divorce final
