I spoke with Bradley a few days ago. Things took a turn for the worse. Right now he is trying to sort out a few things. I figured I would give you a heads up.
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Yes he was driving....if you know what I mean. Changed his mind several times. Still does not have the kids and has moved forward with not a D but a custody claim.
I've told him to post we'll see if he does.
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Bradely, I wish I could smack up upside the head and then buy you a beer.
Your pride and ego has been your own worst enemy and the enemny of your marriage.
No one should say I told you so, and F them if they do.
Are you too proud to come back?
If you are...
then re-read the second sentence I wrote.
If in my marriage it was ALL about Jack, what Jack wanted what Jack needed what was good for Jack's carrer and Jack's desire...Jack should not be surprised if Jack's wife gave him the finger and moved elsewhere, and Jack would hope that some guy would SMACK him upside the head and buy him a beer too.
Your Pride, is your biggest obstacle.
Strangely...it is also your wifes...
In time?
It will also be your sons biggest obstacle to a relationship with you as well.
Pride.
Proud? Good...good to be proud of things.
Pride?
Pride is spite. just spelled differently.
Last edited by Jack_Three_Beans; 06/10/1005:21 PM.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
One attribute of just about every person who comes and eventually stays at this board is humility.
It takes humility to admit that we had a role to play in the disintegration of our marriage.
It takes humility to admit that you are powerless to change the mind of another person.
It takes humility to accept that your spouse could choose to stop loving you and begin loving another.
It takes humility to admit that you don't know what the hell you're doing in trying to navigate through the waters of separation/divorce.
It takes humility to admit that you not only could use the help and advice of others, but that you damn well need it.
Show me a person who has been on this board for any prolonged length of time who does not give off a clear air of humility.
Divorce flippin humbles us. And it damned well should.
My experience on this board tells me that even here the odds are against finding a way toward healing our marriages. I shudder to think how much worse the odds are for those who are arrogant enough to think they have it all figured out, and therefore never turn to others for help, advice, and support.
Brad, I hope you come back. Mostly because, if things have taken a turn for the worse, you're daily walking through a living version of one of the nastier circles of hell. And when you're in THAT place, it sure helps to have some friends around you - even if they are the cyber variety.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
Very good points. I wanted to try and at least provide some context around why the sitch turned the way it did.
In the end, Bradley's W was still in the MLC replay phase in a major way. She made committments/agreements that she never really planned to act on. She was using the kids as a pawn to some extent. Did Bradley handle it as well as he could have? IMO No. He did though need to try and secure an arrangement to see the kids.
Bradley - you know my thoughts buddy...come on back...come on back. This is really about us - the LBS. Make this about you. Not just the kids (although I agree you need to see them) but about YOU the man. The man that you can become outside of a career and outside of a M.
God Bless you dude
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
