Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers I'm taking off my ring April 9

OK. Y'all need to start at the top with me now.

I'm starting to feel really stupid for sticking by her even since March 9 when the bomb was dropped.

Tonight she said, "I'm taking off my ring April 9"

Despite our agreement to figure out things together until June 9.

Way to give 10 days notice.

I can't really send her out to the couch since I'm living at my internship more than I'm living here. (I return to the internship on the 8th)

I didn't do a very good job of saying "I can hear the truth in that"
Mostly I said, "Well, I guess I'll be better off, given how you are acting."

I sent her to her dad's house for the night. I packed up our wedding things.

Now... I don't know if I'm better off or not. Sorta feeling that way. This is a bit much to ask someone to live through.

I feel your pain 100%...I am in the same frame of mind. Do I continue to try to save my M, or is this too much to be put thru? and how would I ever overcome it if we did stay together? Its easy to say we gotta do whats best for us, but hard to figure out what is actually best for us. I saw this quote somewhere on here:

Sometimes in life, the hardest choice is knowing which bridge to cross and which bridge to burn.

Go out there today and buy a chain. Take your ring off and place that ring on the chain and place that ring around your neck.

And wear it with pride.

Wear it to remind yourself that from this forward you will fight complacency. You will fight Passive Aggressive Tendencies. You wear it as a reminder of love. As a reminder of hopes and dreams.

And wear it as reality.

Your reality.

Say not a word for these are only for you.

Your actions from this day forward will speak your words.




There are many solutions to a problem.

No, actually, I disagree -- you should go back to the beginning, and re-read the advice you've already been given.



People in "suspended affairs" don't announce to their spouse that they're taking off their wedding rings, nor do they tell him "the reality is that she's "in love" with someone else, and isn't sure she can permanently walk away from that."

The June 9th thing was always a deflection on her part. She was just pre-buying a predetermined amount of cake-eating time.

Puppy

OK, I gotta ask:

Why does a GUY use "AmyBel" for his username?

Time to change to something that is more reflective of YOU. This just reeks of enmeshment and co-dependency, and a new username might be a good fresh start for you.

Puppy

Excellent question!

Why does a woman use "Cinderellaman?"

Thanks Pup. I have been confused by this . . . thought this was a lesbian couple.

Oops -- I think you're right, and in fact I was the one that originally pointed that out originally!

Going to fast this morning . . . sorry, Amy! Mea culpa!

Puppy

I did last night.
An you all were right.
I thought our relationship was different. Thought we were somehow special. While I was busy reminding her that her situation wasn't special. Can you say hypocrit?

Yes. I'm already dead.
Yes. I need to go dark.
Yes. It feels anti-180 to go dark since the problem has been my absence during internship, but no, this is about me and I can't take care of her and I've gotta get a life that doesn't depend on her.

I am a woman. this is a lesbian marriage.

I research Fergie's thread last night. very helpful.

Amybel

She is doing what most all wayward's do..

Follow their feelings. Matter of fact, it is what most all betrayed spouses do also. Everybody then tries to justify their actions to match their feelings. Normal as can be.