Allen, I stated my opinion an hour and a half ago. You have been posting against my opinion for an entire page. My opinion has not changed. You just keep hammering away with the same dogma. You don't convince me, and I have come to believe that most people on this board are probably smart enough not to listen to your advice either. So I guess there is not much danger that your advice will ruin lives because you are so extremist that people see right through you.
Allen, I stated my opinion an hour and a half ago. You have been posting against my opinion for an entire page. My opinion has not changed. You just keep hammering away with the same dogma. You don't convince me, and I have come to believe that most people on this board are probably smart enough not to listen to your advice either. So I guess there is not much danger that your advice will ruin lives because you are so extremist that people see right through you.
Allen, I stated my opinion an hour and a half ago. You have been posting against my opinion for an entire page. My opinion has not changed. ... You don't convince me, ...
I don't have to convince you, I just have to expose the flaw in your reasoning.. the rest will take care of itself.. and I have done that... Who on earth said I was even intending on convincing you?
I will not participate in mud-slinging.
When you offer a logical argument or counter-argument then I will dignify with your posts with a full response.
When my husband told me that he never intended to hurt me with his affair, I believed him. And I still believe him. I know that hurting me was an unintended consequence.
That is why we are reconciled. A person with your beliefs could not reconcile. You have no plan past the exposure because you can't forgive. You can't go back and have a loving relationship with the person who hurt you because you will not accept the idea of unintentional hurt. I feel sorry for you.
When my husband told me that he never intended to hurt me with his affair, I believed him. And I still believe him. I know that hurting me was an unintended consequence.
Ah, now we get to the truth at last... You are taking this as a personal attack. Did I ever at any time suggest that your husband wanted to hurt you? Nope, i don't believe I have made a comment to that effect.
My counter-argument I won't put up here again, i have said it countless times... if you cut the cheater slack, you have to do the same for people who expose affairs.
Originally Posted By: Lotus
That is why we are reconciled. A person with your beliefs could not reconcile. You have no plan past the exposure because you can't forgive. You can't go back and have a loving relationship with the person who hurt you because you will not accept the idea of unintentional hurt. I feel sorry for you.
Most of this part is you mind-reading.. according to MWD this is a big no-no in communication isnt' it?
You have no idea what my plans are, my commitment to forgiveness, nor what I will accept as intentional or unintentional.
You in fact are the one here condemning those who expose affairs as being vindictive and suggesting we exonerate cheaters as only hurting people by accident in the same paragraph... I suggest you reconsider your position .. as it stands it's wide open to attack yet again.
I feel sorry for people who miss out on quality information because they chose to misread a good post.
Lotus go reads sasha's thread in this section. Or Undefeated. You can see 2 betrayed posters here showing their anger to a woman who committed adultery. Go Read it. While your at it. Take some time to read our opinion on Sandie.
Then take some time to actually read the history of the poster.
Allen A did bo-peep for over a year. A year. And it cost him his health. I know this because not only do I take the time to read his words. I take the time to understand what has shaped him to post as he does. Just like I have read your posts and and taken the time to understand what has shaped you to post as you do.
And you post to me the other day. Was down right rude. I was a true friend to their marriage. I did what no one else would do to save their marriage. I showed him the true depth of the pain that I was experiencing. I showed him what it was doing to his wife and child. It killed me every day to watch an affair take place so I could destroy it. You could not even take the time to figure out who was having the affair and it was 2 posts above. Do not ever belittle the effort and self sacrifice I did to save their marriage. Its insulting. And I am damn well proud of what I did. I will carry that pride with me forever. Pain is temporary. Pride is forever. I was a true friend.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
Lotus go reads sasha's thread in this section. Or Undefeated. You can see 2 betrayed posters here showing their anger to a woman who committed adultery. Go Read it. While your at it. Take some time to read our opinion on Sandie.
Then take some time to actually read the history of the poster.
Pride is forever. I was a true friend.
Thank you CB, solid backup when under attack, that's the way to beat affairs and to survive on an internet forum.
I will give Lotus credit for her commitment and passion, but misreading posts seems to be a chronic problem here.
I saw your post and I stand by it... and your sacrifice did some damage too, that's human conscience at work for you... great stuff.
