Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy Exposure

Even if they don't believe you, if your spouse has any guilt or remorse at all they will feel frustrated that they were exposed, AND you will have the comfort of knowing you tried.

Ultimately its the WS' conscience that has to eat away at him or her.. the family KNOWING he's cheating, even if they encourage it, is still embarassing...

Exposure is a dice roll, some people support you, and some don't, some validate the WS instead... but exposging to see what happens is better than suffering privately in silence.. THAT will just make you ill

At some point you have to trust the public instincts for villifying destructive behaviour...

If you keep the chase up yourself then you will jsut get ill, evetnually you need to step back out of the drama and let the people you exposed to handle him

I have told everyone that my H had an affair but have done so in a lady like manner.His F is not so comfortable and is trying to keep it concealed for as long as possible.(9 mths since BD).My H has still not told his boss he is seperated and living with OW elsewhere.His boss has only heard the stories which are not complementary at all.
It has not stopped him or ow going back to the gym(h gym instructor.Has since moved to another centre but trains where he used to work)to train and work out.Sometimes I think it forces them to put on a united front rather than encourage it to fail??

Has anyone else seen this? I have never approached ow although have been very tempted

I'm not exactly sure what you are asking. ?

Maybe this?
Shining the sunlight on the affair and their sleazy behavior may force them closer together, for a time. This is good! The excitement of Fooling everyone ends. People will drift away from them. They will only have each other and how fun can that be, long-term. The drama will fade and they will be left with the reality of each other. It takes awhile to get a sunburn!

Hopefully you have withdrawn? Your contact will feed the drama.

I exposed to OM and my own workplace, and also to the STBXW family. Positive results from both. OM having a very tough time at work, whereas I have nothing but support it seems. The in-laws have been fantastic, openly disapproving of her behaviour, and constantly asking me to drop by, still supplying me with farm eggs and game!

I am hoping the pressure is finally coming to bear on both of them.

The one thing I have had reinforced during this tumultuous time is that too many people in the world just want the quiet life and refuse to stand up for any kind of morality. I have lost count of the number of people who just "don't want to get involved," or "just don't talk about relationships anymore with x" despite me asking how they would feel in my situation. I have deleted these people from my life mainly - as far as I'm concerned they're accomplices in the destruction of my marriage.

Just the same as no-one bothering to ask the teenagers to stop graffiting the wall, or the litterbug to pick up their litter. Everyone is scared of the consequence of standing up for something that's right these days. And marriage has become a throw away commodity, just like a mobile phone that is designed to last only for a year, or a TV that is cheaper to trash and replace than repair.

I have had no ctc with my H for 7 months.The same applies to our 2 D's who have disowned their dad.He did txt 6 weeks ago saying he would sign everything over in return for D.I txt will speak to my lawyer and there has been nothing since.
I like the sunburn bit..can I use a hot torch on it!

The point was exposing the affair did initially encourage them to hide..they are now out of their bolt holes back in public domain.

Oh...How romantic....barf

I heard something similar..."I'll just take my car and walk away from everything"...boo-hoo

I, too, have seen this. I find it disgusting. It has contributed to my own growth, however. I confront the people in the park not picking up after their dog, rudeness towards cashiers, but I still tattle on shoplifters. I am finally learning to stand up for myself as well and it all began with exposure of the affair!

after 28 years a txt!!! but she has given him confidence whey hey!!I have given him a free ride for 28 years, no pressure, beautiful kids,holidays,lovely home, funded his retraining for a new career.
She is a disgusting excuse for a human being.Her H cheated on her and guess what she got another one!!!
Have you approached the OW at any time?

totally agree.Infidelity should be punishable by law.I say bring back the stoning, tar and head shaving! (Ryans Daughter)

I sent her an email during exposure, saying I knew, asking her to respect my 23 year R, and end her A w/my H. It caused some drama but I really didn't expect anything from it. She is a Home-wrecking Ho who isn't worth my time or energy. She isn't really the issue here either. It could have been anyone who was nice and admiring to H during that time.