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What is your FB status?

"John Oliver = comic genius." I was watching The Daily Show last night. We're both big fans of the guy.

It's like she wants to be BFF's at the same time she's leaving me for another man. Pisses me off.

Maybe she is trying to normalize things by doing this BFF bit. OR or or...maybe she is checking to see how short a leash she can keep you on. Unfriend her on FB and see if she spins up. Don't answer her "how ya doin" text messages. Be dark and distant. See what happens. Should be interesting.

Many time WAS don't enjoy so much in reality what they wished for in their fantasies.
Greek

I already replied to this one, but all I said was, "good." She invited me to events on the 13th and 19th (last week, after she left home). I'm not going to cancel, but I'm not going to attend. I'm not on her leash, I'm through being her lapdog/doormat. We'll see what happens.

Being Dark means not replying , Not checking out what she is doing. Its a rest for you heal heal while she is creating and living in the vortex.

It will take a while for you to fully understand this concept. Its a tough one and its very hard to not be sucked back in. True dark would block her number and delete the emails without reading them.
Anyone one mentions her you change the topic.

Thats true dark.

It's actually very typical walkaway "script."

I told my wife that I had no intentions of being "best friends" with her (nor even a friend), if she ended our marriage this way (cheating on me, and lying to her own family about it, and refusing to work on the marriage). We would be CIVIL, and co-parent, but I'm sorry, friends don't treat friends that way, good lord!!

This shook her to her core, hearing this from me, and this -- along with the exposure to her mother and our D-then-18 -- had, I believe, the biggest impact on her decision to end her affair.

Puppy

PUP- I tried that b/c it seemed to work for you, and she didn't budge- the last time I told her there would not be a friendship, I was met w/ "but I thought you wanted me in your life."

I replied "I did not marry you to be your friend."

In hind sight, I should have just said "friends dont do what you're doing"

I suppose.

Just because she didn't budge now, doesn't mean it didn't have an impact.

I believe my words were along the lines of "Within the context of this marriage - I am your best friend. Outside of a married relationship - no."

And by the way, in case you can't tell from my posts, I'm a firm believer that sometimes a simple NO, is more powerful than any lengthy explanation.

Especially when it's the first one.

I'm just going to ignore all her texts, e-mails, FB posts, and stand her up for our "friend dates" this month. I'm not going to go out of my way to initiate a conversation with her right now just to tell her I don't want to be her friend. She'll get the point pretty quickly.

In the meantime, I definitely just got asked out on a date, and I'm going. My wife left me for another man. If that's who she wants to be, he can have her. Maybe we CAN even be friends someday.

Staying dark, but life's sucking less every day.