If my W is having an PA, but she won't confess, can I asked to see her cell phone. I don't have any hard proof. I asked her to give me proof she wasn't because she insists she is not. (my gut says otherwise)She's convinced I have something bugged. I think the story about making up a story hopping I would "hear" is complete B.S. Not only that but it took her a couple hours to come up with that idea. Enough time for her to call her girl friends and figure out a good story. Why would she lie about it if she is so dead set about getting a divorce. I told her I couldn't be hurt anymore than I already am. What kind of game is she playing. I don't want to go and follow her around to get my evidence but I may have too.
If she wants to get divorced so bad why is she dragging her heels? I don't mind her taking her time, but if she is going to have PA why drag this out? What is she waiting for. I told her she needs to do all the work and tell me what she needs on my end. She has made little effort other than lashing out some random list of things when she gets angry at me. I'm very confused. It seams like she wants to make sure I'm around just enough to satisfy her needs. She seams more interested in my life than I do hers. Is this a good thing or a test?
It's how she deflects the blame away from her. Just the fact that she refuses to show you her cel phone says alot.
It's much easier for the WAS to blame the LBS, than look at themselves as the person at fault. Don't fall into it. If she doesn't want to give you anything, you have the answer you need.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
W sent txt @ 12:45 this morning. It said she missed me. This is the first time she has even come close to saying something like that. I was sleeping so I didn't get it until this morning. I replied thanks. She also took the day off sick. I think she was out drinking, and she's has a intestine problem coming back.
Not sure what else to do about it. Is it a good thing? I don't want to read into it too much. But like I said this is the first sign of change since she left.
I'm not giving up on the possibility of the OM. Until I get hard evidence I need to back off. Not that it means much but her dad emailed me last night....
"Shortly after she moved in we had a discussion and I told her that if there was any thought about anybody else whether it was interest and/or seeing until things were settled that I would ask her to move out. Thought you might like to know that."
Soleil, thanks I will. I didn't want to look like I was pursuing her by giving a response like that.
It does sound like her dad is on my side. But she can play him like a fiddle too. Him and I are going have a little sit down soon. Should be interesting.
I'm going to try to keep it man to man. I have always respected him. He knows what kind of daughter he has. We have had these talks in the past. He knows how hard she is to deal with. It has to be hard for him to take a stand to her. He is a good man. I think he will do what he can without getting involved to much.
I wouldn't answer her "I miss you" texts. Repeating it back is pursuing to a degree and it feeds her supply. She's trying to pull you back in toward her because something's going wrong with OM. Only once you're there, she'll push you back away.
There are many parallels in your sitch to mine. I believe she might severe emotional issues and you are co-dependent on her.
Stand on your own feet first. You can't resuce her, nor can you fix her. You can only fix you. Get to work...on you!
I see your point. I need to stand firm. Buy no means is this her way of wanting to get back together. I have already told her our old relationship is dead. If we make another go at this we start of new. Only after we both get the help we need can we start over.
