Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
LoLa - I'm just reading over everyone's shoulders here... LoL
I have an almost S13, and, he's had two "girlfriends," one for about six months. The girlfriend's mom and I were on the same page, as well. They only did stuff w/us in attendance! However, NOW that they're broken up, I'm NOT impressed w/what I've been seeing in his txt's! Girls sending pics of them in camisoles, etc... I just had my H have a talk w/him. He was SO embarrassed!
I like the talks that make them squirm a bit.
I've lived through a D18... They need to LIVE wondering when they'll be uncomfortable next!
Good Luck!
Have a fun New Year's, whatever it becomes!!!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Mindfull...thanks for sharing!!! I have two grown daughters, and between her father and I we keep tabs. I have to admit, some of the stuff she does get in text messages shocks the hell out of me...she is 13...did we know this stuff at her age? The jokes, pix...eeeek.
I love being the mom that makes the kid uncomfortable...and when she asks me why I keep bringing this stuff up I tell her it is my God given right as a mother to make her feel as uncomfortable as possible so that if she is ever in that situation, she might stop and hear my voice in the back of her head saying "can you thin of your life right now if you had a baby...dead...etc..."
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I have to admit that I'm not very good at having those 'uncomfortable' talks with my son. Heck, I wasn't good at having talks with Gabe!!! I was raised in a VERY conservative home. My mother never discussed sex, I learned about everything through health class and friends. One time, when I was 17 she asked me if I had any questions. Ummmmm.....too late, thanks!
Any suggestions on the best approaches to speak with a 15 year old boy? I know Gabe has talked a little with him, but lets face it - Gabe sees him a grand total of an hour a week so not much influence on him.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Mish...my family too!!! And we didn't have a health class that taught sex ed. I had no idea what VD was...and one time in the 7th grade the teacher was talking about rape, and I had to raise my hand because I had no idea what it was. It is no wonder I got pregnant when I was 16!!!
For your son, CONDOMS. Open it with that. Tell him this is a hard talk but one you feel you should have because you are looking out for his safety. The chances are that he knows most of it already, but hearing it from a parent is always a plus. Safe sex, abstinance, I think I told my girls that if they decided to have sex I would much rather them come to me for birth control rather than have unprotected sex. D23 did...when she was 15 and as much as I didn't like it, I also knew she was going to do it anyway and so I made sure she was on the pill and had condoms.
Is it better to talk about waiting? Absolutely...but realistically it is better to be prepared either way.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Gosh! I had forgotten that. I remember having that convo with you quite a while ago and commenting that you were a BABY when you had your D23. If you aren't the voice of experience I don't know who is!
Thank you so much. That is going to have to be my goal in the new year with him. Make this an open convo and hope that by doing that he is comfortable enough to open up to me. I don't want him having the same questions I did and getting all the wrong answers, or answers that go against what I believe.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Ahh no, D23 was the second. D24 is the first (she is almost 25 now.) I was a baby having a baby twice, first at 17 and second at 19. So I know ALOT on this subject...probably more than I would ever wish on anyone!!!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I really do...and I have not felt that way in a long time. I mean, I have done well, and managed to get up on my feet, but I am really starting to feel good again. Except, that is, for the two feet of snow outside!!! LOLOL!
Anyway, SG texted me this morning. His truck...repo'd. No, I don't feel great about that, but at the same time for such a long time he was such a smug bastage, walking around like he was king Shiznit, and now, he has been knocked down a few pegs.
Now, don't get me wrong. I do feel bad for him. But at the same time, I also think God is trying to teach him a really HUGE lesson. I just hope he gets his head out of his ass and learns it.
Of course, SG also volunteered this information. Not sure why, but whatever. Guess his phone was cut off for a few days there too...
Here I hit the growth. It used to be that I would have wanted to rescue. And I have offered, to an extent. Of course, it does help that I am 3000 miles across the country, so there is not much I can really do. But for the most part, this time, I have not really offered much, just kind of allowing the lesson to sink in. I am wondering if he will ever figure out that maybe he would not have lost everything if he had just tried to make the marriage work instead of bailing.
Who knows...maybe I will never know.
What I do know is that I am satisfied that I tried.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
If he hadn't run away from his problems (M and work and life and otherwise) he definitely would be better off now. But everyone has that learning curve. So, maybe he will learn.
Who knows. That's up to him.
I am so glad you are really feeling happy and free!
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2