Oh, I have a bunch of nicknames for my H. One is the International Man of Mystery since every thing he does is cloaked in intrigue. It cracks me up whenever I say it! Laughter helps us keep a grip on sanity,SpyBunny.
I LOVE that one!
SD
Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
I do have the following guys all waiting for their turn: Jim, Dave, Derron, Norm, Doug, Jeff, and others... but they're all on hold. Some sent messages: We can just talk if you want...
Heh. Yeah, I wouldn't trust any of those guys any more than I would your husband right now. They all sound like exactly the kind of person who would try to take advantage of someone in your position.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
I found a sexual abuse support forum online to tide me over until I can see my IC and can get some face-to-face support. I'm waiting on the registration approval from the administrator; I'm not sure yet if it's the right place for me (the message boards are all private so I can't poke around just yet), but I'll give it a try- it couldn't hurt.
I'm also checking into Sex Addicts Anonymous- again, I'm not sure if it's the right place for me, but I'll try. I can't believe it's come down to this for me.
I'm calling the IC on Monday to see what I can arrange there. She might have some referrals or something for local groups. I'm not sure what angle to approach all this from.
I want to be furious at H- what the he!! did he do to me, and mad at myself for letting him... I feel nothing though.
I'll post the list of my positives shortly- I'm working on them.
I just caught myself doing this while responding to another post. I talk and think like I'm still at home and still part of the family. And this wasn't the first time. Earlier this week while talking with some friends at work, I mentioned something that would happen at home and my friend helpfully reminded me that it doesn't matter anymore because I'm alone now... my response "oh, yeah..."
I thought by now I would be used to the new arrangements, I am trying to make this place more "mine".
*Good listener- I listen, ask questions when appropriate, don't interrupt. *Good cook (Italian and Hungarian- I can cook chicken parmigiana one night, chicken paprikash the next, and they're both excellent!) *Good seamstress- one of my gifts to nieces when they marry is to to do the alterations on their wedding dresses, and I get asked to alter all the bridesmaids/mother of the bride dresses too. I'm the one aunt allowed in the bridal suite before the wedding! I also made a wedding gown from scratch for my cousin according to her drawing, and lots of christening gowns and little girl holiday dresses. *Good mother- I think I strike the right balance between being involved and caring without "helicoptering"- too much *Big blue eyes- I get lots of compliments on them
*Good cook (Italian and Hungarian- I can cook chicken parmigiana one night, chicken paprikash the next, and they're both excellent!)
I was going to suggest that you make a really nice meal for yourself. Maybe even something you haven't tried before. Plan it out, go pick up fresh ingredients. Make a great meal for yourself then maybe watch a rented movie or read afterwards. Just have some YOU time.
I'm trying to do that- start making my favorites again, I felt funny/awkward trying to get started cooking here. I don't know why- I guess part of it was "why bother?" if it's just me here. but the kids seem like they're getting more comfortable, so I'm hoping they'll spend more time here.
And tonight is meatloaf, breaded noodles and veggies. Last night was baked potato soup and salad.
