Honestly my small (read as "big") problem with alot of the users on this forum and not just you in particular, is that we give you direction, sometimes extremely specific but you still have to question it, put your little touch on it because everyone's situation is so "unique" that what we offer as advice couldn't possibly work for your situations.
Hmmmm.... most of these situations involve a man and a woman, one of them is a walk away spouse, the other is the left behind spouse, sometimes an affair is involved, either EA, PA or possibly both.
You are seeking her approval when you texted her the way you did. Read what you texted and see how you are seeking her approval. Why are you asking if she is going?
Because you only react to her actions, you don't take a leadership role in your own life, you can't determine the course of your life's direction, you can't determine how your life will be lived, because it's always based on what she will do and that isn't masculine, manly, attractive or anything a woman would want.
If she texts you and asks if you are going to the attorney, tell her this "I'm already here, we were going to wait for you but I think you've wasted enough of my time so I'm proceeding as is, you can speak to the lawyer afterwards to get the details you require"
Did the OM care that she was married? Hmmmm.... nope. He just did what he wanted to because he is enjoying his life. Maybe you should emulate him more, apparently he has what it takes to attract your wife to him.
I'm pretty sure he's not asking for permission, he's not reacting to what she does, he's just doing his own thing, and having fun with his life... can you see that?
Are you able to do this?
I'm really not so sure anymore.
15 pages into your thread and you still haven't made the headway you should have made. You question your actions, you aren't confident, you aren't decisive, you are worried about what she does (when you ask her questions if she's going to do something, you are worried about what she does, even on a small level it shows), you are insecure, you are jealous, now tell me of all of these traits which one screams SEXY to your wife or any woman?
robx swings a 2x4 like he is Rick Flare, Woooo! Do you get the message these guys are sending you, very specific, very simple.
You can do this!
Burt
WOOOOOOOOOOOO! The "nature boy!" Rick Flair, the man of the hour, the man of the power, he's too sweet to be sour! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!
LOL! Thanks Burt, I appreciate the recognition ;-)
I would also appreciate it if OB could act instead of react and start being a man about all of this - in the end we're dealing with the concept of self-respect, how much do you have and why are you allowing other people (including your spouse) to disrespect you so much?
Honestly my small (read as "big") problem with alot of the users on this forum and not just you in particular, is that we give you direction, sometimes extremely specific but you still have to question it, put your little touch on it because everyone's situation is so "unique" that what we offer as advice couldn't possibly work for your situations.
Wow how true is that. That just smacked me like a 2x4 because that is how I think.
Greek, My wife rationalized her EA as "we are seperated", I can't use the same excuse. Don't get me wrong, I have a moral problem with seeing someone while married(and have been more than faithful). But, I don't want to miss an opportunity, plus I need to practice talking to women again. Not trying to start a fight, just want perspective from you veterans. Sorry for the hijack.
