Yep.... the default judgement! That's what I did, though in my case it was because we agreed on everything. Then I filed, with what I "wanted", which basically just said everything was already split. After I filed the petition, and she accepted, XW had 20 days to respond. Then I filed an application for default, which gave her another 10 business days to respond. After that it was just waiting for the 60 days to be up, and as long as the judge thought it was equitable, it was done. Since the petition claimed everything was already split, there wasn't anything to talk about.
You might have more of a challenge, though. I think Dan could well be hiding stuff, and your attorney might need to file something to compel him to come clean, or risk contempt of court. Though it might be possible to just split what you know about, and have words that protect you if something is found later. Don't know about that.
Well because he wants to keep all the cattle, the farm equipment, tools, and vehicles, I should be receiving a fairly substantial cash settlement. His 401K alone is equal to double my annual salary!
The thing is, I had agreed to a not-that-huge lump sum amount, but as I think of all the things he has that have value, I think that number is rising...I am not out to screw him but I do want to have what is equitable for me. At this point my income (including his child support $) provides for everything the kids need except medical insurance premiums. He writes his once-a-month check, and I do the rest. Even though he wants 'joint custody' the expenses are not 50/50 more like 90/10...
So anything I get I figure I can use to make the kids' lives secure. I am not as much of a spender as Dan. I do buy my share of Starbucks lattes and such, but where I splurge on a $30 sweater, he gets a $500 tool for the cattle business..
Anyone know what happens if he doesn't disclose his numbers? Do I just get to pick a number or do we have to force his hand? I don't want to pay more legal fees to get that information...
I don't have a clue BBJ! I guess you could guess really high in the petition, and if he doesn't counter, then you were either right, or he loses. That might be the easiest way to force his hand. Since I know he is not dumb, if you are going to clean him out, he will have to come clean.
Joint custody can mean a lot of things. If you are going to have the kids more than he does, make sure you get the money you should. I found AZ's child support numbers to be really low, we agreed to a higher number. The judge didn't object to signing off on that!
I don't have a clue BBJ! I guess you could guess really high in the petition, and if he doesn't counter, then you were either right, or he loses. That might be the easiest way to force his hand. Since I know he is not dumb, if you are going to clean him out, he will have to come clean.
Joint custody can mean a lot of things. If you are going to have the kids more than he does, make sure you get the money you should. I found AZ's child support numbers to be really low, we agreed to a higher number. The judge didn't object to signing off on that!
Yep Dan is being generous on some of that stuff, too. He stipulated that I should receive alimony for a minimum of 5 years, up to 8 if I haven't yet remarried. Since I am young and employed, typically spousal support is only for 2-3 years.
He also stipulated he wants me to get 30% of his salary bonuses for the next 5-8 years, same conditions apply re. marriage. So that is good!
I texted him asking for either his 401(k) login information, or the current balance (the last statement I have is from 3 months ago). He replied that he will finish things up at the hotel tonight (he is in Canada again), that he has already done the estimates for the cows, tractor and trailers...
Your L should be the one advising you on how best to get all the monetary numbers together in the case of Dan being his usual procrastinating self.
I also think you have to have a written parenting plan that has the time allocation with each parent. That is part of the child support calculations.
It sounds like you have a pretty good deal now with his attitude towards being more than fair.
Kerry-
We presented a parenting plan with our draft of the settlement. He gets the kids for a series of days in a row, then I get them. It flip-flops every two weeks. I think I get them 8 out of 14 days and he gets them 6...
That being said, it assumes he has a place to HAVE the kids! And right now, he doesn't.....so I don't know if we will have to do an interim plan, or not...
BBJ, Since I am so cynical I have a tendancy to think as some above that Dan is relying on your "goodness" to try to get away with paying les than he should. Up here it is 50/50 (of everything)...end of story. I see no reason why you should accept less.
Yep, agree with John, but with a caveat... 50/50 of assets acquired during the marriage.
I was in Dan's shoes as the one in the marriage with the much higher income. I went above and beyond to show proof of all income. Just remember once facet of Dan is he has proven to not be up and up trustworthy by the mere fact of lying and sneaking around in an affair.
Does he have equity in the company he works for? I had equity before marriage, but X's L did not try for any of it as the valuation was the same as when she married me.
When I dropped off some of the financials with the atty's assistant, I found out something that surprised me.
Apparently the 90-day period starts when I filed. Back in September.
So, if we successfully write up the settlement on 12/9, and Dan signs it when he gets back from his trip 12/11, we could easily be divorced by his birthday 12/20...
I know it is coming but that is faster than I anticipated...I thought it would be 'all over but the judge's signature' by then, but still 90 days to wait. Apparently not.
I know it is coming but that is faster than I anticipated...I thought it would be 'all over but the judge's signature' by then, but still 90 days to wait. Apparently not.