So, we sat in my attorney's office for about 5 hours and redid this freaking decree about 6 times. We stayed in separate rooms and his step dad was with him instead of his mom this time. We never sat in the same room and did not speak. We saw each other and exchanged a few glances. He kept asking my attny staff to talk to me. They said no.
He sat out there and cried and paced most of the time, but also laughed and cut up with his step dad and attorney. The staff (of my attny) said either he is very manipulative or bipolar. OR MLC!! But they don't know this.
Anyway, I mostly got what I want, he did lower the child support but we only gave him 6 months and then it goes back up b/c he needs to get out and get a job.
Dropped the criminal charges on the assault and he is ordered to go to a 28 week anger management course.
I was mostly okay, way better than he was. I did have to go to the restroom and get it together once cuz I could feel the tears coming when we actually started to initial all of the pages of the decree. 13 years since you were 18 all initialed away in about 5 min.
Anyway, I am somewhat emotional but glad it is over with. The judge signs it on Tuesday. A hard day, but I came out okay.
At least he didn't challenge me on the kids at all. Thank God.
I'll be back later.
Oh, and I owe 2700 more by Tuesday....
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
Well, picked up the kids after school and went shopping for their Halloween costumes. They had a blast at Party City. Omg when did it start to be 65 dollars for 2 costumes? Sheesh. Guess I had not really paid attention. Anyway, they look too cute and had to try them on today.
Still feeling a blah and emotional, but I am just thankful for the fact that I have my kids.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
and you neglected I called you out don't please I said we're stronger than this now you resurrected mistakes years past it seemed and they exist to still haunt you
and still you feel like the loneliness is better replaced by this I don't believe it this way and I can see the fear in your eyes I've seen it materialize Growing stronger each day
I could see it as you turned to stone Still clearly I can hear you say don't leave, don't give up on me two weeks and you ran away I remember don't lie to me you couldn't see that it was not that way swear I never gave up on you
I wanted nothing but for that trust again and brick by brick you would take it You feared of phantoms and none exist but you you still saw fit to destroy it
and still you feel like the loneliness is better replaced by this I don't believe it this way and I can see the fear in your eyes I've seen it materialize growing stronger each day
I could see it as you turned to stone still clearly I can hear you say don't leave don't give up on me two weeks and you ran away I remember don't lie to me you couldn't see that it was not that way swear I never gave up on you
and you neglected I called you out don't please I said we're stronger than this now You feared of phantoms and none exist but you you still saw fit to destroy it
and I can see the fear in your eyes I've seen it materialize growing stronger each day
I could see it as you turned to stone still clearly I can hear you say don't leave don't give up on me two weeks you ran away
I could see it as you turned to stone still clearly I can hear you say don't leave don't give up on me two weeks and you ran away I remember don't lie to me you couldn't see that it was not that way swear I never gave up on you
All That Remains
Kinda reminds you of MLC, huh?
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
So, had to take off again for tomorrow, but for the last time at least in this stage of the saga. I feel a huge sense of relief that this mess is about to be over.
So, Friday he calls and emails me twice,just for random nonsense that he wanted to talk about. Then I had to email him about the kid's schedule this coming weekend (he has them and it is S b-day Friday so I am not going to be with them at the meeting place until 6 which is the mandated time anyway, but I usually drop them earlier because his step dad takes them when he leaves work). And my son has 3 games this weekend so we need to discuss that.
Of course I email him and hear nothing. He is hiding from me b/c he has a support pmt due friday and he knows I really need it for S b-day. What a jerk.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
Well, this thing has almost come to an end, as far as the legal stuff. I know that it is really not the end though, but I do hope that things calm down somewhat.
Last edited by SoConfused; 10/12/0911:31 PM.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
Hey Sweetie, I know that this is not what you expected your life to be. I am sure you are feeling a million different feelings. Take some time for you, to regroup and heal.
My prayer and wish for you is that you and he can coparent on friendly terms, that he gets the help he so desparately needs and becomes the father your children deserve, and that you find peace and happiness.
Well, as of about 9:00 this am I am now officially divorced. It's been a long, hard, emotional roller coaster ride. Even though I was ready for this to end, I have still shed some tears today. This is not the life I wanted for my kids. But, as he is right now, it's better for everyone that we can have more peace and a predictable routine in our lives.
I honestly don't know what will happen to him. I will just have to watch it play out. My best guess is that he will not hold a job, and will just run away or slowly fade out of our lives. Who knows?
I know that I have looked inside myself, dealt with some stuff, and matured and become a much better, kinder, and more patient person throughout this ordeal. And that will benefit me greatly in the long run. I know that my kids (especially S) have learned to appreciate me and respect me being strong and taking care of them through this. Son came out with some stuff last night that really surprised and made me feel good. Even though they are young, they know who is consistenly here for them.
About the last 3 years have been filled with stress, and I am ready to find some peace in my life, enjoy my kids, and be happy. It goes by way too fast and before I know it my kids will be grown.
I am worried about finances, but we will be okay. I know I can't count on J getting it together to pay c/s. Would be nice, but I doubt it. I will find a way to make it work.
I truly appreciate and love all of my friends that I have met on this board and that have encouraged me, held my hand, and even pissed me off a little when I needed it... LOL It would have been a much rougher road without you guys. I love y'all!
Now on with the next chapter....
S's b-day is this weekend and he will be gone with his dad. He's turning 9. He wants Rock Band for his WII, so we are about to go find that tonight. Should be fun for his "old" mom to outrock him... HAHA.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
