Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Hoping WAW will someday see through the fog....

SSE,That's wonderful. May God (continue to) bless you!

Well, I made it through the taping of my testimony - Actually the preperation for it was much harder than the taping. Thanks to some helpful editing, I was able to get it done in one try. Now, the baptism is on the 29th and the testimony will played in front of 3,000 people. Hope it turns out OK! Had I gotten the late service it would have been streadmed live over the internet. ohhhhhhh.

Anyway, wanted to post some interaction with W from last night and today. Just simple stuff, but seems slightly different than the past. As readers know, this week is supposed to be my off week out of the nest. Well, because of my taping I needed to be here this weekend and W decided to take S10 to our mountain place. It gave me and s12 a nice weekend together so all was good. I received several phone calls from W and s10 over the weekend which were pleasent. Nothing more nothing less.

Last night she got home and as I was packing she told me that I did not have to go, but could stay in the house this week. That led into a short non-confrontational discussion about our future.

Paraphrase:

W "You dont have to go to the mountains if you dont want to"

M "Well the weather looks kinda rough with the Hurricaine approaching. looks like lots of rain the whole time. Will let you knwo in the morning after I look at the latest Weather forecast"

W "OK, either way is good for us"

M "Well, if I stay it might be good for us to see IF we can get along at all anymore.
chit chat, chit chat...

W "You know, if there is any chance that we can ever be H and W again, I think we will need to see this D through"

M "Well, I am sorry you feel that way. There are other alternatives that are not as financial devistating and emotionally rough on the children"

Then S10 showed up and we ended the discussion.

This morning she was very nice to me and even commented that I was looking skinny (we all know about the weight loss that we each go through. She hasn't noticed in 4 months that I have lost 25 lbs.)

So are we making any headway here at all, or is this just a rest stop on the way to "D"?

By the way, I chose to stay only because of the weather and the fact that I get more time with the boys. Given the flash flood watches and warning, I decided it wasn't the safest travel time.

Ugh. Makes you look WEAK.

Better answer: "I'll be fine (throw in a little laugh); thanks for your concern, tho -- that's sweet."



Double-ugh! PURSUING! "Needy/grabby"!!! She tries to offer you a common courtesy (staying at the house, rather than going up to the mountains with bad weather approaching), and you immediately turn it into PURSUIT and R TALK.

Dude, you've been at this too long to keep making such BASIC tactical mistakes.

Puppy

PDT, thanks for the 2x4. Hence the reason I am still in the postion I am. Basic mistakes.

Will improve on them. INteresting though is that in mind, as I was saying it, I was processing NO R, No Pursuit. It was really just to say, can we even stay in the same room together and not fight non stop. Not a matter of can we have a relationship. However, what was said and what was thought apparently are two different things.

Yep. The self-restraint gene. It's what separates us from the greater apes, kwim? Well, that and some basic hygiene, I guess.

Puppy

yep. Except they dont get D. LOL

well, successfully navigated today with no R discussion (actually no discussion at all) and a great swim in the cold rain. Nothing beats that.

On to the next 24 hours, one hour, one day at a time.

EXCELLENT!!

So today went pretty well. A small R discussion tis morning, but dealt with with quickly. Her emails not returned. 48 hour rule.

Tongiht we had a family pizza night: the following is a journal entry meant to be sent to her, but will not .. this is for here only:

WAS, thank you for an incredible evening. For the first time in months you acted like my wife again. As we drank down those cold beers I could see that look in your eyes. The one I used to see many years ago. The one I fell head over heals in love with. I dont see it often any more, but boy was it nice tonight. We laughed at old stupid jokes and made eye contact like there was no tomorrow. Was it the beer, or was it more? WHow knows, who cares. It was a small slice of heaven.

When we came home you asked me to watch TV with you for a while. It wasnt my style, but i agreed and enjoyed. Even found a new song I love.

Then you asked me back to OUR bedroom to watch the rest. I decided to kiss you on the forehead and retreat to my room. I couldnt take it any more and could not make a wrong move.

Thank you again for an excellent evening. I expect nothing toorrow, just know I appreciate tonight.

Journal entry over.

No comments necessary. I'd rather do this then actually send her this email

SSGA,

ME? Not comment? pshaw . . .

1) Who initiated the "small R talk" yesterday morning?

2) NICE TOUCH on the kiss on the head! Perfect.

***DON'T SEND THAT E-MAILLLLLLLL..........***

Puppy

P.S. Did I tell you not to send that e-mail? Just checking.