Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Not in my nature

I have been a member for a couple weeks and have made some posts here and there, but I really never stated anything about my sitch.

A quick rundown. A WAW sitch that happened about 3 weeks ago. She moved into her parent's house (about an hour away from me) with our 1 year old son (I miss him sooooooo much). We have been married for about 8 years. 8 rocky years due to resentment over her decision to move us closer to her parents, which was about 2.5 hours from my family and friends, along with constant financial issues. Several other issues along the way, that created 2-way resentment and she finally had enough. Somewhat understandable, but for her to just walk away was very devastating to me (especially after we had just started a family).

Anyways, the topic of my thread is such because I am not really the snooping type of person, but I recently checked our cell records and saw a # listed that she either called or received calls from several times right around the time she dropped the bomb. I tried calling the number to see who it was, but it just goes to voicemail. Does anyone know a free way to do a reverse lookup? I think it is cell phone.

thanks
pimg

www-dot-ussearch-dot-com

Could just be a BFF confidante, but I doubt it.

Good luck.

Puppy

Yesterday was a rough day. I have been doing really good lately just taking things one day at a time and not even doing any R talk. I had to meet my W on my way home from work to pick up my son. It was my birthday.....my W didn't even acknowledge it. I guess my expectations were too high. It really hit me hard. I drove all the way home fuming thinking about it. When I got home I called her cell and left a voicemail to let her know how disappointed I was....maybe I shouldn't have done that, but I really felt like I needed to.

Her mother called to wish me a happy birthday (my W is staying with her parents for now), which was very nice of her. My W got there shortly afterwards and her mom must have told her that she just called me. So my W called (before she listened to the vm I left) to wish me a happy birthday and she laughed it off like it was no big deal. I said you must not have listened to the vm yet and I told her it wasn't a pleasant vm. I told her that I guess my expectations were too high and we say good bye.

It was a had day - a day that really solidified the fact that I am not that important to her anymore. So, I will continue to o things for myself and my son.

Hey robx, if you read this could you respond?

I saw your post in another thread about packing up the W's stuff. I left a response in the other thread, but I don't want to hijack it.

Here is my post:

Interesting post robx. My W plans on going by the house some time during the week to grab some things. She has been out of the house for a few weeks now - she was at her parent's house, but yesterday decided to move into a house that her brother-in-law owns (free for her while it is still on the market). She still has some personal belongings at the house such as clothes, artwork, etc.....things I could care less about. Do you think it would be prudent for me to pack up all her stuuf in advance and send her a signal?

I need some opinions. As I have stated above, my W has decided to move forward and get a place of her own with my son. We don't yet have any legal separation.

This choice she has made is so out in left field since she has little money to her name and no real income (owns her own business, but it is very very slow). I am really mad that she has decided to walk out on our M and she gets to have my son most of the time. I only get to see him on the weekends due to my work schedule.

The opinions I am searching for:

Should I allow her to remain on my health insurance? I would only leave my son.

Does anyone think that I might have a chance at full custody? I would look into a live-in nanny/aupair or daycare.

Does your W work at home? Just wondering how she is able to watch your son if she owns her own business.

The business is very slow right now and she also has a couple employees. Plus she can take him with her.

well one thing comes to mind,
how did she get to make the decision to take your son away from you?

Have you spoken to a lawyer concerning this?

Just taking him and establishing full custody like that without even considering when you get to see him and for how long you get to see him seems a little presumptuous.

Do you have him half the time at least?

When do you see him?

Do you get to keep him for several days - do you guys swap having the kid?

By law, if you were to pick up your kid, she could not call the police on you for parental kidnapping. The same goes for her which is what she has done if I read this correctly.
Tell her that she needs to establish some form of legal custody agreement between the two of you since she is the one that left, otherwise you can assume (as can she) that you will have your kid half the time and so will she - if she has a problem with this, she will have to do something legally about this.

She has not attempted to keep me from seeing him....it really boils down to me being out of the house for 12 hours a day and being an hour away from them now. I do take him for the weekends now, but now I am just beginning to get really mad at the fact that she walked out, but she gets to have him with her 24/5. It just makes me wonder how she would feel if the tables were turned.