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Sorry, but I can't even make heads or tails of your post.

What threat are you talking about? If I file for divorce? I'm not trying to save my marriage anymore. I'm tired of being treated like a doormat. I think you're saying she's not going to take me seriously but I'm not sure.

And the more I think about it the more I could care less is she takes me seriously. As long as she leaves me alone. I have social gatherings to attend to.

The threat of a contested divorce. I'm saying that you don't even necessarily have to GO THRU one, so long as she BELIEVES you will, she will probably give you what you want (maybe even more).

But I don't believe that SHE believes that such a threat from you is credible.

Puppy

You should. An uncontested divorce, worked out amicably thru a mediator, is only HUNDREDS of dollars. A CONTESTED divorce, with both of you retaining good (pronounced "ex-PEN-sive") family law attorneys, is THOUSANDS, and some are even TENS of thousands.

You are more likely to get what you want (and deserve) if your wife DOES take you seriously.

Puppy

Got it. So, I hear you and the lawyer I spoke with suggested going the uncontested route and drafting a letter to the wife about what the terms were. I don't think the wife wants to go through a contested divorce. She may not believe that such a threat from me is credible but whether she believes it or not it's going to happen. I'm the type of person that when my mind is made up, it takes a lot to change it and I mean a lot. At this point, I don't see her changing it and she's the only one who has the ability to do so. And it cannot be through talk, it has to be through action. I am not interested in spending my life with someone who is not interested in me.

Another thing the lawyer mentioned which was very saddening to me was that we could work out a visitation plan for my daughter but under FL law, once she reaches the age of 15, even if there is a plan in place for visitation, my daughter does not have to go see her mother if she chooses not too. I wonder if my wife understands the impact of her actions on my daughter--somehow I doubt it and feel that it may be years and years before she get it and even longer before my daughter can get to a point where she can forgive her Mom.

That mindset is what will set you free. That is the mindset of someone who is healthy......

When you have the right mindset you will be saying and joking and even slightly believing the following type of things...

Women are a dime a dozen... (I always have a dime in my pocket)

Last woman who broke it off with me it took me almost 2 hours to get over her.........

And the classic..... "my wife ran off with my best friend..... Gee I sure miss him"


Get the right mindset and stay in the right mindset...

Glad to see you starting to say the things that show me you are finally getting with the program....

Thanks Gucci, I'm trying I really am.

Well she called a little while ago and talked w/ my D. She asked my D if she could speak w/ me. I shook my head no. D told her no. She insisted w/ my D several times--let me speak to him NOW! Nope no dice. (D told me all this after the phone call) D asks for my email address to give to the wife--come on, she already knows this. D comes to me after the phone call and says she thinks I did good? I said, what do you mean? She says, by not talking to her. She treated you like a doormat. What??? I was stunned. This 13 year old girl has seen this more clearly than me? Wow.

So, the wife emails me and basically it's a bunch of crap that didn't need to be said about my daughter. I find it amazing that now that the OM is gone she suddenly cares about spendng time w/ my D.

It was very hard for me to not talk to her on the phone but I think I'm doing the right thing. Hopefully, this will get easier over time.

You did good.

Out of the mouths of babes.

Keep up the good work.

Ya done good, AF. Ya done good.

Puppy