Just had to stop by my ex's house to pick something up for the kids. She has no love in her eyes at all for me. It just leaves me feeling that every minute we were together was a lie. It's like she was pretending to love me and pretending to be a wife. I think she loves her life now and never for a second thinks about our family as a whole anymore. I have to find a way to look at her now and say to myself "how can I still love a person that clearly does not love me"."How can I love a person that does not share my values of how important the family is and to do everything to have a family together"? I really have to start to look at her as a person that I used to know. She is not the person I married anymore. Glad I am going dark. I will have my kids for the next 3 weekends in a row and a week in between. It's going to be so much fun and I just have to focus on that. I have sooo much to give to someone now. It's so sad that my ex has no interest in all of it.
Me/W: 46/36 D7.6/S6 T/M: 7.5/6.5 Bomb 12/05/07 D final: 03/03/09
Yeah, I know it's tough. It has to be one of life's most difficult ordeals. I do see how people have trouble getting past this stuff. I've read enough horror stories about this type of thing.
Keep posting also...if you want. This board helps me to vent also. Not a cure-all, but it does help. You just have to decide what you want to do. Our situations are kind of similar, and I'm not ready to pack it in yet. There will be times when you think that you're going to go insane. Besides....since you live in a city that I want to visit, I need all of the INTEL that I can get. LOL.
