Don't know what to say, GH. She seems to have lots of money for travel. I don't know many people who could buy tickets and go running off across the globe on short notice. Nor do I know many who truly want to. I do hope OM will treat her poorly too. If nothing else, does she not even see how undignified it is to go chasing after a man like this? Most people have too much pride to do it.
She has really made an utter fool of herself this time. Her dad found her packing her suitcase and went ballistic and she's been sending OM emails saying how this new girl isn't good for him (!) etc. She must have spent $10,000 on travel in the past 8 weeks alone. I'm very encouraged by the fact that I feel peaceful and indifferent. I went out with friends yesterday, have been playing chess again (only recently got my ability to concentrate back) and will be surfing tomorrow. Life goes on.
Yes, I think she is making quite a fool of herself. It would be the rare man who found it attractive to be chased by a pregnant married woman who had left him before. I think most men would find her frightening.
Hi mate, got to agree with Saffie that your conversation with her seems almost surreal ...
Me 42 W 39 Married: 11 Jan 1998, T: Since 1992 First Bomb: Sep 2007 Confirmed A/OM: 4 Nov 2007 Kids: D10, S5 Reconciled and together again after (alot of) time and heartbreak. 3rd kid, S, born 2 Jan 2010.
Ok not to be negative, but you said you didn't want to talk to her, but just before that you said you spoke for 2 hrs before work and then 1/2 hour at work, right? That's a lot of time to talk to someone you do NOT want to talk to...I know you have a baby coming but seriously, I hope you decide to move out before she gets back.
Don't eat the chocolates- goodness only knows what she put in them!!!!
BTW, who is financing all this globe trotting your W does?
I truly hope that you mean it this time that you won't be waiting at the airport for her. If she buys you a violin exactly WHAT feelings does she think you are going to attach to it.....for all you know it is one OM is getting rid of!!!!
Your W shows a complete disregard of ANYONE other than herself.....even the baby, ( the amount of travelling and OP sex she is having makes me feel sick). Surely you can see that this R is beyond redemption. What hoops would she have to jump through to show she really felt remorse and how could you ever believe a woman who has lied to you so easily over anything and everything?
You have got to have your plan B.....and I would suggest even a plan C in case your W manages to scupper plan B.
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
I have had a great weekend. I went out on Friday night and got in very late so Saturday was a peaceful time to catch up on chores, run errands, relax and play chess in the evening. On Sunday I went for a drive up the coast, caught up with a good friend for a few hours in the afternoon and went for a barbecue in the late afternoon/evening. W's two younger brothers and her youngest sister showed up to express their support for me and disbelief at W's latest antics, saying what she's doing is disgusting.
Yesterday morning I had 5 missed calls on my mobile from W who rang from OM's house. She left 2 messages to say that OM had come home to find her in his apartment and they had had a huge argument - she'll be coming home in the next few days. She said "OM and I had a huge argument and we can't be friends. I had wanted us to be friends but it isn't going to happen, I can't take a trip to Germany when I am all cut up inside so I'm going to come home in the next couple of days".
She tried calling me again later when I was hanging out with a friend but I didn't pick up, then tried again later in the evening and left another message. My sister and another friend mentioned she had written on my Facebook wall but I haven't looked. She doesn't seem to care slightly that she was ringing me on OM's nickel - I'm sure he's thrilled about that.
I have not checked my email to see if she's written although I suspect she has and I have not replied to any of her communication. In fact I was perfectly enjoying my Sunday afternoon until she tried to ring.
BobbiJo, it has only been after she's gone that I realise just how much better life is when she is not around. I knew it intellectually but couldn't feel it until the last few days. I also feel utter shame for not cutting loose so far and for being an hysterical mess caught like a deer in the headlights.
Flynny, I am a cultured boy with a love of literature, music, chess as well as travelling and any activities which induce a "rush" like climbing, surfing etc.
W is paying for all of this with her own money that she has earned and her credit card. One thing I'm speaking to the lawyers about is to take measures to ensure that I'm not liable for the debt in any way. I'm told there are measures I can take in Australia to ensure that is so.
Thanks very much for your support so far.
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)
I am concerned for you, wasn't trying to be mean about it...I know I have let my husband come/go as he pleases way too long and I don't want others to make that mistake...
I am glad you are out and about enjoying yourself and not taking her calls. Apparently she thinks telling you she is coming back because she is heartbroken that OM doesn't want to be friends, will do what for you exactly? Are you supposed to be her soft place to fall now that he has rejected her again? Wow...
I would have thought a guitar!!!