Divorcebusting.com Forums Divorcebusting.com Archives Surviving the Big D Archives Stop the Pity Party!

First off Sun, I DID NOT KNOW HE WAS MARRIED!!! Did you not read the part that said I found out AFTER it happened!? I was not aware of everything going on with his psycho trash!
Am I saying what I did was right?! No. But ya know, thanks for the judgment.

Thanks Gypsy, for the reply. I've been around kids forever, but having my own kids deal with it makes it so different.
Last night, I went on 'date night' with S4. He seems to be doing better the more time I spend with him. But now it's bringing out a big jealous streak with D2.

"Divorce Care" is a program offered around the country. they also offer a year round email daily encouragement "one day at a time" that will be helpful whether or not you can ever find a group.

One Day at a time

I attended one and know many who have attended a program in their local areas and everyone who participated indicated it was worth the time and effort.

As others have said, it does get better. You have a LOT of life ahead of you. Your kids will take their cue and need to see one sane parent.

As horrible as this all is, you have your kids and it sounds like they are healthy. There are many two parent families with ill (or deceased) children who would trade spots with you in a heart beat.

My X remarried quickly and she has the kids. I have nothing except for my integrity and a wonderful relationship with the Lord (and my children- who are healthy). I am indeed a blessed man.

It will get better.

(p.s. stay clear of yours sister, to treat you as she has, she has bigger problems than you do).

Thanks C2H...I looked at the website and the church I attended last week is on the list. I'll definitely look into it.
On a side note, I'm needing ideas on how to respond to a certain question that keeps getting asked. I live in a military town. I've been getting the question alot lately, "Is your husband military?" I know it's no one's business, but it's asked a lot when my children are around. And yes, X is military. Today at the car dealership, I just answered, "My kids' dad is military." Again, I know it's no one's business and I don't owe anyone an explanation, but how would be a proper answer for that in front of my children who would question my response?
And speaking of the car dealership, get this...the car I've had for exactly one month and one day is acting up and I keep getting the same response when I take it in. "The battery is fine." Altho today they did tell me when I pressed them to check the car's computer that I would need to leave it for a day or two so they can do more testing on it. So tonight, I get in it to go get gas and the check engine light is now on along with the Engine Throttle Control light is flashing. So I guess I'm just a crazy woman who is craving attention by constantly taking it in because it keeps dying on me. So tomorrow I'm taking it in and telling them they have until 2:00 to either fix it or get me into another car because my D has a dr's appt at 2:20 and if they don't comply, I'm turning my kids loose in the showroom. Gotta love Dodges and their electrical problems. :-D

Just another thought, today would have been our 8th wedding anniversary. And I'm handling it a lot better than I thought I would be. It's not so much that I'm wishing we were still together or anything like that. It's more of mourning what we once had.

livin,

re the anniversary, as we forgive and get more focused on living and enjoying our lives, the passing anniversaries, hurt less and less. "Mourning" what we had is a common way we describe it.

Strongly encourage you to pursue the DivCare. You will learn, get access to helpful resources AND likely find some support from real people you can see an touch (as oppose to us cyber people). It has been 30 months since I started that program and I remember the growth we experienced in that time frame and still stay in touch with the leader from time to time.

My anniversary was Christmas Eve! That's a blessing in that the anniversary is overshadowed by Christmas. Hang in there, it gets better!