Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis Am I doing the right thing?

I told Trapt this a while ago, but when you start giving them some room, they start taking it. Kinda like when one is fishing and they set the hook on a big fish, the first thing one is supposed to do is let out some drag on the line. Kinda the same thing with a MLCer. The more you give, the more they take..

The up and down days are normal, in the end you will realize that YOUR moods will even out too...Not a bad thing bro..

One day at a time my friend...

If I asked you to walk to California, you would think about the trip as a whole and tell me to pound sand. But if you just started walking, and didn't think about it and made the neccesary adjustments along the way, before you knew it, you would be well on your way.

Think of this as a similar path to walk.

You are doing well D......keep walking, one foot in front of the other...

M1

Well I'm doing much better these past few days. I'm just letting my wife spin in her own little world. S11 is having difficulty with her though. Kids spent Wednesday night with her. He told me Thursday when they came home that she's mad all the time and it seems like she's always mad at him. I reassured him that she's not really mad at him and that she loves him very much.

They are with me this weekend and he told me he's glad because he doesn't even want to go to her place. The kid is mature beyond his years and definately more mature than his mother right now.

Quotes from S11:
"Daddy I just don't get it. Mommy always complains she doesn't have any money but she went out and bought 15 new movies. Couldn't she have used that money for something that she needs?"

"The only person Mommy seems to care about is herself. Everything is about her."

"Mommy acts a lot like D8 and it's very annoying."

Hi D,
Kids are so intuitive. I'm glad you are doing well-sounds like detaching is getting easier. When our spouses act 'crazy' I do think its easier to detach and focus on ourselves b/c they are certainly not the same person we fell in love with and married!
I hope the rest of your weekend is fun!

Had a wonderful weekend with the kiddies. It rained all weekend but we played lots of games. S11 says to me on Saturday "Daddy, thanks for doing things with us." I feel like the greatest Dad in the world.

Only had 2 interactions with wifey. Saturday I sent her a quick text thanking her for depositing money in my account that she owed me. Her response? "I told you that I would" Yikes! I just want to tell her to chill the F out but that wouldn't be very smart so I move along.

2nd interaction was last night. She sends me a text at 9PM to see if I could find a book of hers and have S11 take it to her place on Monday. She says to ask S11 where the book is.

The funny thing is she sends this text more than an hour after she thinks he would be in bed. I let him stay up a little later now so he was up and able to find the book.

I let her know we found it and she actually did say Thanks.

Isn't that feeling awesome?!

Absolutely!!

OK. A little update. Had a positive interaction with wifey this afternoon. She tried calling my cell twice and then left a message on the home answering machine to call her. She sounded like her old self (God I miss her). She wanted to talk to me about a couple things.

First she said S11 is leaving her place for school too early in the morning. Why call me? She could very well have talked to him about it when he's back over there tomorrow. Hmmmm...

Second she had to ask me if she could use the debit card for our joint account to get a new pair of shoes and she would put money back in when she gets paid. OK she has used it a few times over the past month without asking and without putting money in. Why did she feel she needed to talk to me about it this time? Hmmmm...

Hi D,
May be some positive signs! Keep doing what you are doing.

Hey D-
How goes it?

Thanks for checking in K. I've stayed away from the board for awhile. Got spewed upon last Wednesday. Will update later.

Here and other places you do have people who are there for support...just and FYI....we all pay back, and we do that by being around.

Getting support or advice It is not less manly, unless your getting advice from trapt. : )