Lady canceled the job we were supposed to do for her, leaving us with a 2500 dollar bill for material.
H has completely gone off the deep end. He went off on me so bad at 5am this morning, ive just about had it. All over the fact I forgot to buy cat food (meanwhile this is the cat he brought home that S6 and I are allergic too). He called me some names and threatened to wake the whole house up because I told him I forgot and that I didn't want the cat to begin with. I have enough to tend to.
So of course he's acting like nothing happend. Thinks I'm just being miserable today... WTH???????
So Im promising myself, once we get through this week, Im just going to tell him that if he doesn't get professional help for his anger and just plain verbal abuse, that I will be doing what I have to.
What other choice do I have??? No, I have no money to leave or a place to stay, but I guess I'll worry about that when it happens.
We can't be subjected to this anymore. I'm beginning to hate this man. Even the good parts of himself don't even look good anymore.
Im so angry, angry that I let my kids down, angry that I let it get this far, angry that I quit a good job I had to help him with the business, Angry that I wasn't strong enough to leave a long time ago, Angry that now my kids life will be turned upside down.. and Its my fault, I should have done something about it.
There's nothing left in me anymore.
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Hey now...YOU have done NOTHING wrong. If anything you gave your kid a longer time to have both a mother and father. this too shall pass. Have you thought about getting a job? Let husband fend for himself? And why did you need cat food at 5:00am anyway? I have learned one things Cats do not starve.. they find birds, lizzards, mice when they are hungery enough. I made some chocolate chip cookies.. ya want some?? Is there some way you can collect some of that money from that lady? Don't you charge some kind of deposit? If not you will be able to use it on the next job..
Why don't you grab your kids.. hop on a plane and fly out here. The fireplace is lit and we can have some milk and cookies...
you smiling yet???? I model my man panties for ya....
Me
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
I'm beginning to think you are an exhibitionist. You would model those man panties for anyone!!
Fish,
I've told you before that your H is like my son. Angel/devil. Well, son has been living with his GF, a woman 12 years older than him, and her 2 little boys. Last week she sent S25 home. It took him a few days to admit it to me, but he opened his big foul mouth to her and called her some names that he is too embarrassed to repeat to me, and she kicked him out. Now he is talking about getting therapy to deal with his anger. And he spent 2 days in bed reading a book on emotional abuse. He visited GF yesterday and brought roses, candles and rose petals to sprinkle around the room. He managed to stay the night, but today he is home with me again. Apparently she is being strict with him, and it is working. I think you need to get mad and not take it anymore with your H too.
No, I have to say that your H has lost his freaking mind. He has GOT to get into counseling for anger management. One day he's going to be devastated to realize what he's allowed his stupid, petty habits do to his life.
You're his wife, for crying out loud! He needs to recognize that you and your kids are his very life, or at least he might finally realize that if he'd ever get his head out of his sphincter. Man!
Hugs to you, dear lady. You don't deserve this insanity at all. Cat food!?!
What other choice do I have??? No, I have no money to leave or a place to stay, but I guess I'll worry about that when it happens.
Fighting,
I think it's time to live up to your new nickname (which I love, BTW). "I'll worry about that when it happens" sounds like a victim to me - and I would much rather see you taking control of your situation.
If H finally does shape up - great, no harm done in have been prepared.
(((Hugs)))
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
H tries to start a fight with me this morning. He went to bed last night pouting... I didn't bite.
I did tell him the following: I will no longer deal with your yelling and screaming. when you can talk to me like an adult is when I will communicate with you. Your nasty attitude towards me and the kids will not be tolerated anymore.
He then starts with the cat again.... I said this is not about the cat, it is how you treat me when you talk to me. Your verbally abusive and angry all the time.
I said, You have nothing to complain about, I take care of you, the house, the business and the kids, What more do you want out of me, to totally take away my spirit???
Then he says, well, we can just be friends, (im like "yea who the hell would want to be your friend???) I didn't say that though. i said nothing.
So now is he giving himself permission to cheat now.. that was the first thing that popped into my head, and lord help me, if that is true, I will be leaving skid marks, i will absoultey not deal with that again(any form of it).
So silence again. he just doesn't think the way he talks to me is wrong. Swearing etc. I don't swear in front of my kids (im not perfect either, I do slip) but generally I don't. He has a truck driver mouth, which I can't stand.
What I was thinking was, Im going to talk to my girlfriend, and see maybe if when s6 is out of school i may go and stay with her for awhile. I know she will take us in, Even if it is for only a week or two. I think I need to be away from him.
All I feel anymore is anger, I don't want me kids to see an angry mommy all the time.
Good lord hindsight is 20/20. Why oh why did I not see this coming. i could kick myself.
On top of it all he's going to work on sunday, yup mothers day. I'm not mad though, really. I would rather just be with my kids alone and not deal with his drama.
btw doc, If I had the means I would hop on a plane, trust me..
I just don't understand how a person can just be so hurtful and mean to someone they are supposed to love and care for.
My brain hurts trying to even guess what the heck is going through his messed up mind right now.
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Well, I got a call from the preschool about S3, seems he was being defiant and hitting. So I had to go and pick him up early.
I cried the whole way there.
He kicked and screamed as I got him in the car, then turns around and says f**k you to me. I just about died.
I pulled over and slapped his hand and told him not ever to use that language again. I hope and pray this is an isolated incident. He's never acted that badly before. No doubt he is acting out because of what is going on at home.
Im devasted.
I brought him up to his room and he eventually fell asleep.
I tell H when he comes in from outside. I told him that is why you have to refrain from swearing. Of course he took it badly. Proceeded to tell me that he just wants to pack it in, claim bankruptcy and start new (without me.) Then he just went back outside
I just sat here and cried.
My mom called me in the middle of it. Wanted of course to know what was going on.
I told her a shorter version, but basically that things are bad all the way around.
Then she told me that no matter what I can come there with the kids and live whenever I wanted to , that I was never to feel that I had knowhere to go.
So, that was a big relief, let me tell you. Really was. I guess I always knew I could go there, but it was a matter of my pride, especially since they have never liked H.
But this is my plan now. I will talk with him this wkend and just tell him that we need to go to therapy, and if he refuses, then After the school year is up, I will be leaving to go to my mom’s for a trial separation.
Trust me, I don’t want to have to do this, but It’s the only way I see anything turning around.
Im heart broken over it, but im not happy staying here either. When he isn’t here, every is fine, when he is here everything is drama most of the time.
Im exhausted, mentally and physically drained but at least I have a plan. I just have to have the strength to stick to it.
Ugg.
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
ya want some??
