I know you so well only because you are ME, H4U, and your wife is my wife.
I have the same decisions to make.
Me too Pup. It'll be nice to be away this weekend with just S16 (who'll turn 17 on the trip) and my brother. Give me and my brother lots of time to talk and let me have some time to think about things.
Wouldn't it be ironic if I came back from the trip and told her I wanted a D and she said she wanted to really make it work?
Hope4us
Me - 49, W 49 S22 & S18 Dday 9/4/07 W claims NC 4/7/08 8/29/09 - Divorce Busted. Lots to work through, but we're going to make it.
Wow, great points. I think you may have something with the blind trust. Like you, I trusted so blindly that I think it allowed me to take too much for granted. Something to think about...
Do you guys think you can every really trust your Ws again? I'm finding that this is very hard for me now. Any insights on this?
WP
Honestly? No, I don't. It's very hard to trust someone who shows NO interest in the effort, introspection, and spiritual surrender and contrition necessary to start a new and stronger foundation.
I also worry about the high recidivism rates of infidelity, and know that without putting certain key systems in place (no-contact and transparency -- CHECK!... meeting of each other's primary emotional needs/LLs, MC, IC and individual introspection -- DOHH!!!), there is very little long-term success for which to hope.
Wouldn't it be ironic if I came back from the trip and told her I wanted a D and she said she wanted to really make it work?
You know, maybe I'm getting old and cynical. I used to fantasize about things that involved Britney Spears and large vats of hot fudge. Now I fantasize about things like the above.
Wow, great points. I think you may have something with the blind trust. Like you, I trusted so blindly that I think it allowed me to take too much for granted. Something to think about...
WP, in your case, I think a good transparency plan was called for, and I had suggested it. Did you guys ever do that?
My trust issues have more to do with me trusting my wife with my HEART again, moreso than me being worried about any repeat infidelity AT THE MOMENT (I do worry about it long-term). After a year and a half, I finally let go of the keylogger, and now she's suddenly chatting more on the computer all of a sudden.
Do you have your own thread yet? How are things going with you and Mrs Pup?
I'm going to be starting one very soon, Saffie -- thanks for asking. The short answer is, NOT GOOD. Put it this way: I don't think you'll find the thread on this (Piecing) forum. :o(
