I'm not sure if I should be calling myself 'a better man' anymore.
After much time spent talking to GF and XW this weekend, I'm not sure what I'm doing anymore. Pretty sure I'm going to lose both. XW knows GF is still my GF. GF knows I talk to XW, but isn't thrilled about that at all.
XW and I have seemingly reconciled and are carrying on as friends, which is all I think I want. I'm not sure though. When I'm around her old feelings ignite, but I try to keep them in. She planned a trip this weekend, and I have been wanting to go to the same destination to visit friends for some time now. We agreed we'd carpool up there but I'll be dropping her off at her friend's place as soon as we arrive. I am looking forward to the time we'll get to spend talking on the ride up, though. Guess I'm curious if there is still enough there to reconsider my position of not wanting to work things out.
My GF has been working in another country for 9 months now and I miss her a lot. I'm not sure if these feelings creeping up for XW are because they're real or because I feel lonely... As in, if GF were here would these feelings for XW still exist? I don't know, but need to figure things out before I fly down to meet GF next month. That is the self-proclaimed point-of-no-return for XW. I can understand that.
I should really just spend some more time being single! Then again, that just means I lose them both, but my feelings right now aren't healthy for anyone involved
but I'd get most of the life I am familiar with back.
Honestly, was the "familiar" life all that? The familiar life let to your wife cheating on you. To me this sounds like people wanting what they can't have. I can tell you that it's more difficult the second time around. You will be more wary of her and she'll be more inclined to leave if things go back to what she hated before. It isn't all sunny and nice the second time around. The trust will be really hard to restore. I would be very cautious about trying again.
You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with. Dr. Wayne Dyer
I'm left wondering how that weekend trip went. Did it happen? I was reading your thread and thinking "Run Forrest, Run!!"
Like the other advice that has been given, I would put the failed marriage behind you and move on. The new GF sounds fantastic. Doctor, travel, giving. Take it slow. Have fun.
