Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis I think I'm done...

SCF your post made me laugh. That is exactly how some of my convos went with my h when this all began. He would say things like so you don't want to talk to me.

It was more like I felt let down, betrayed and left in the dust and you want to chat with me. Hey just to remind me that you don't want to live with me. It is all so confusing.

Sounds to me like he was trying to open the door to communicate and needed a reason to call you.

Hang in there!

Yeah, what's funny is that he doesn't have a problem communicating or anything else with me (you know). It's just that he has this other fun new life for whenever he wants it. We can get together and act just like it's old times. I was too friendly through all of this. He's been having his cake and eating it too. When I found out the latest about his new womanchild interest I decided that I needed to cut him off. That's why he was freaked out when I didn't seem "friendly" today. He doesn't want me to be "mad" but does all of this stupid shiat.

I'm definitely happier now on my own than I was with us together. I don't have to worry about his erratic behavior or what stupid thing he's going to do next financially or whatever. I actually sleep better at night. Not so much stress. It's just wierd because he can act perfectly normal and it's fine. We could have remained friends with benefits for however long. Now I just can't while I know he's interested in someone that barely qualifies as an adult. Ugggg. I was not bitter because it was my call for us to separate, due to his wierd alien behavior. Now it's just yuck. We were supposed to work on stuff and go to counseling but it never happened. Guess you are not too interested in trying to fix the old broken life when you have a "fun" new one.

I cannot picture ever getting back together with him at this point. I have higher expectations that his behavior would just not fit into. I feel really hopeful about the future for myself and my kids. I have grown through this and he has not. A couple of months ago, I would have let him come back. I don't think it would have lasted, but I would have. Now, I would not.

Our imaginations can work against us at times. Don't for a second think his life is all fun and games.

Life doesn't work that way. It has a way biting you in the arse when you make poor choices. It may take a little time but it will happen.

Yeah, I'm figuring it will come crashing down around him in the not too distant future. I just hope it's not too bad for my kid's sake. If it was too bad, I wouldn't put it past him just to run.

You think he would just bail?

Quite possibly. I wouldn't say he's above it in his state of mind the last couple of years. That sucks, doesn't it? Not for me, but for the kids.

Yes it does. How often does he spend time with them.

Maybe once a week lately. He doesn't even call every day. What's crazy is he used to be a really involved dad when he wasn't at work. I mean, got up in the middle of the night and let me sleep, changed a zillion diapers, everything. Every day he doesn't call his kids just puts another brick in that wall for me. No respect for a man like that.

That's too bad..

I struggle with stuff like that at times. They become the opposite of who they were.