LIS, I think you are good at being calm, almost too good maybe. I think you should work on your boundaries, being assertive,and not being passive or aggressive. I read a book my C suggested on the Verbally Abusive relationship (Patricia Evans) and it said that people like your W tend to see people as weak if they aren't assertive, not nice or good people as you or I or most of us think. They have a different way of thinking, and I think they lose respect if you're not careful to set and hold firm to your boundaries.
(((Karen))) thanks. I will have a look at that. W is very used to getting her way (and I contributed a lot to that). Now that she is not, she is panicked in some ways.
Update - no house rented. W was looking at apartments yesterday. D16 told a good friend this and it got back to me. D16 also said W was being very bitc#y.
Anyway, just a little update for now.
LIS
M45 WW 43 D17/S14/D11
ILYB Jan 08 PA Conf Feb 08 OMW / OM contacted S Jan / 09
No one ever has, or ever will, escape the consequences of their actions.
I used to post a few times in some of the earlier threads but kept up on reading it... But where is LIS??
Has ANYONE been in contact with him. His last few posts he was discouraged and she seemed like she was going to blow?
Me 53 H 50 D16, D29 M 22 years bomb 7/08 INH - alien pod replaces H 8/08 - OW (direct report), I work there also bomb II - H moves 10/1 expose ow 10/22 D to be final 9-09
(((Karen))), (((Tawnya))), (((wdid))), H4H, hope and (((kat))) [from the alt univ]
Thanks for your concerns all. I am here - sorry for not letting you all know.
Hope, you raise an interesting point. She hasn't blown at me yet, but she has blown elsewhere! She talked to the friends (who's R she thinks I poisoned per above) for 90 minutes on Friday, apparently all in tears. Friends told her I had nothing to do with poisoning R - all about her choices. SHe chose to not hear that of course.
She has spoken to D16's friends as to what she should do with her house situation, etc - a 43 year old talking to 16 year olds - sick!
She has resoted to bad mouthing me to anyone that will listen - those that no me are shaking their heads.
Oh, so much fun!
Have traded voice mail with the C for the kids - soon.
Last thing - mediation starts next Thursday. Let the reality bug start to bite!
Thanks to all for caring!
LIS
M45 WW 43 D17/S14/D11
ILYB Jan 08 PA Conf Feb 08 OMW / OM contacted S Jan / 09
No one ever has, or ever will, escape the consequences of their actions.
Me 53 H 50 D16, D29 M 22 years bomb 7/08 INH - alien pod replaces H 8/08 - OW (direct report), I work there also bomb II - H moves 10/1 expose ow 10/22 D to be final 9-09
Karen