Yeah, DB'ing is more about you and very little about the WAS noticing or not --- nice if they do. My mom used to always say "not to wish my life away" --- that's when I couldn't wait for time to go by until something wonderful would happen. I don't blame you for wanting the D to just get finished, but I would advise to not wish your life away. Be in the present, even if it's painful 'cause it's what will allow you to know the difference between true happiness and utter misery and finding a little in each despite going through one or the other. I hope I'm making sense here. Yikes! I did have my brain operated on recently so .....!
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Yeah, DB'ing is more about you and very little about the WAS noticing or not --- nice if they do. My mom used to always say "not to wish my life away" --- that's when I couldn't wait for time to go by until something wonderful would happen. I don't blame you for wanting the D to just get finished, but I would advise to not wish your life away. Be in the present, even if it's painful 'cause it's what will allow you to know the difference between true happiness and utter misery and finding a little in each despite going through one or the other. I hope I'm making sense here. Yikes! I did have my brain operated on recently so .....!
I understand what you're saying. And you're right--best just to be in the moment and deal with it, otherwise I will end up continuing to deal with it for a long period of time.
M60 H52 D20 M14 yrs OW-old gf from 1986 bomb-5/18/08 H filed for D-9/10/08 D final 4/24/09 xH remarried (not OW) 2012
mediation is scheduled for mid-March, but I don't know if that will happen since I don't have the funds for the mediator. my atty advises this is simply an unnecessary and expensive additional step that H wants in order to say "hey, it was a friendly divorce, we did mediation."
as of this morning, I have a raccoon living in my basement. not by invitation. no, I am not making this up.
earlier this week my gas was shut off; I haven't been able to make even the minimum payment since December. I knew it would happen eventually, I just thought there was some rule it had to wait until spring. guess not. researching some assistance; don't qualify for much since I'm an "underemployed professional."
yes, this could definitely affect my custody of D13. and it terrifies me.
I wrote a note to H's pastor earlier this week, pointing out that continuing to support him in all of his liturgical and leadership roles essentially makes them complicit in his moral failure, and breaks the covenant the community made with his family to be as supportive of us as of him, in this priesthood process. I doubt I'll hear back, but it needed to be said.
M60 H52 D20 M14 yrs OW-old gf from 1986 bomb-5/18/08 H filed for D-9/10/08 D final 4/24/09 xH remarried (not OW) 2012
Sometimes I feel that the world is just turning upside down, Hmama! What one thinks is written in stone, turns out to be written in mist. But, if you have your faith in God, your health, a roof over your head and your child still at home, then you got it good-ish. Maybe it's time to find a better paying job even if it's not perfect for D13's schedule? Better than losing her all together.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
I wrote a note to H's pastor earlier this week, pointing out that continuing to support him in all of his liturgical and leadership roles essentially makes them complicit in his moral failure, and breaks the covenant the community made with his family to be as supportive of us as of him, in this priesthood process. I doubt I'll hear back, but it needed to be said.
