So I had H over last night cause I was sad for old times. And we spent the entire time arguing about the A. So I guess it made today easier. As of 7:00 this morning I am now the sole owner of my home. H signed as he said he would but then sent me some bitter texts.
He feels very hard done by. He feels like I am coming out on top - and to some extent I am. Financially I am better off than him but I did work for that and I am not responsible that he ran up debt behind my back and didn't pay it so ruined his own credit.
I do not want him to be in a bad spot finacially but I had to protect myself and my daughter and make sure she still had a nice house to grow up in. Its not her fault this happened.
He thinks I am better off now - without him here. I may actually be slightly better financially. But I guess what he dosen't realize is that he was my everything. I would trade anything in this world to go back before the A and have things turn out differently. Or even the time immediately following me finding out and have different choices.
He said he lost everything today - everything he could ever say he owned. If you will allow me a minute for self pity in the last year and a half I have lost the following some to larger extents than others:
My Husband My Marriage My family unit My belief that I was special My belief that love conquers all things My trust in people My faith My belief in marriage in general My trust in men(more contributed to the married and dating men hitting on men) My integrity My pride My morals My dreams My extended family My vision of the future
Me~34 H~38 D6.5
EA/PA-DEC.07
Moved out~Apr.13,08 Sep. Papers~Dec.7,08 No contact order ~Dec.9,08 and again October 13, 2009
It looks like it is time for me to give up posting again. Posts followed by angry texts and phone calls don't help in my healing process. I am really more at a point where I come here to journal so I guess I will find somewhere else to do it :-)
Take care all,
Denise
Me~34 H~38 D6.5
EA/PA-DEC.07
Moved out~Apr.13,08 Sep. Papers~Dec.7,08 No contact order ~Dec.9,08 and again October 13, 2009
