Divorcebusting.com Forums Divorcebusting.com Archives Surviving the Big D Archives Year 2: rolling along!

Happy birthday, Wii!

Thanks folks! Last night STBX took the girls and I to an East Indian restaurant for dinner to celebrate and afterwards we returned to her place for cake and presents. STBX presented me with a gift box of all our family pictures duplicated and organized chronologically. Each group of pictures had a little paper band wrapped around it and she'd written when the pictures were taken and how old the kids were. We had at least 8 large albums of pictures. It was a very nice gift on her part and she obviously put a lot of effort into it. So now that she's been nice to me she'll have to find some way to rip a strip off me! Hmm, I wonder what it will be? Actually, she did call later in the evening and asked me why I was allowing our D to do her homework in front of the TV. I guess I just lost my head for an evening! Well anyway, we did have a really nice family time and that's what really counts, isn't it.

Wii,

51, right? Congrats! Boy, what a CONFUSING relationship you have, and how difficult it is to get any "detachment" space. It seems like you spend a LOT of time with a woman you will eventually divorce. At least my STBX hates me ALL of the the time, and that has made it much easier to detach. Is she "borderline" or what?

Good thing she bitc6 slapped you for letting your daughter watch TV while doing homework. (I hope you let her eat a can of frosting and Oreos for dinner too. Make it worthwhile to get your as& handed to you!)

Hi FLTC, thanks for the kind wishes!
I just finished reading my devotional for today and it had something to say which is applicable to your last post, here it is:
"There is no human love that is not broken somewhere. When our broken love is the only love we can have, we are easily thrown into despair, but when we can live our broken love as a partial reflection of God's perfect, unconditional love, we can forgive one another our limitations and enjoy together the love we have to offer."
Something for us all to strive for and remember, eh?

Wow, WII, that's a great quote. I'm going to print that off.

Thanks.

Ellie

Glad you liked it, Ellie. It's from Henri Nouwen who was a Catholic Priest before he passed away. I've written down quite a few quotes from his writings:

"Let us not be afraid to look at everything that has brought us to where we are now and trust that we will soon see in it the guiding hand of a loving God"

"Community is not a place where we are no longer alone but the place where we respect, protect, and reverently greet one another's aloneness...our solitude will allow us to rejoice in the solitude of others."

"Intimacy is the fruit that grows through touching one another's wounds"

"We need to forgive one another for not being God"

"Evil is the absence of God's love"

Those are a few anyway!

Sometimes there are little things that hit you about being alone and you realize you are alone. Tonight I went to pickup my D from her class and stopped at a drug store to pick up some bread and a drink for D. I saw some cereal on a shelf with a sign reading "sale", I knew from the flyer that it was 1.99 so I grabbed a couple. AT the cash it was rung in at the regular price of $4.59 so I questioned this and the cashier called someone over and he asked me to show him where this sign was, so I did. He then said "oh, that sale starts tomorrow" I replied "but it's not tomorrow, it's tonight and your sign says 'sale' " and again he says "but the sale is tomorrow" So I went through my argument again "you cannot have a sign up saying 'sale' and then charge the regular price" At this point another clerk rushes over to inform me that they need to put the stock out the night before so they are ready for the sale tomorrow. Once more I say "I understand that but you should also be taking the sale sign down or you are misleading your customers" So, one clerk says he'll go talk to the manager and when he returns says "the manager says the sale starts tomorrow" OK, you get the picture and with his snarky tone I got a little heated, but anyway my point being that afterwards I realized I had no one to come home to and share this story with. It may be a little thing but little things matter too! I miss knowing there is someone to come home to and share events of the day...not that I really had that anyway in the past few years but...maybe one day...maybe one day.

I am glad you put it here, wii. Yes, we do miss the little things.
But what we miss, we can also create in different ways, no?

Like, I can't BELIEVE that dumb store!!! What happened to "the customer is always right?" I hope they gave you the sale price. Sometimes, you have to say, "Yes, you are right that the sale starts tomorrow, but I appreciate you giving me the sale price tonight since the sign is up and not clearly marked." Don't give em an option!

You going to study tomorrow? I have mine in the morning - we are looking through "disciplines" for Lent, and just learned about and practiced journaling (I don't know ANYthing about that! )

Oh, and I like some of those quotes btw, especially forgiving others for not being God. Maybe a journal entry...?

Love your quotes, Wii! And thank you so much for your kind words on my thread, and putting me on your prayer list.

As for the dumba@@ store ... WTF!!!!! My S21 works at Staples and he says they will never do that ... they always give the customer the sale price if it's up the night before. But then, ya can't buy cereal there, 'eh! Tell me, what store was this? I am guessing the one that starts with a SH!? Hope that particular branch was just an anomaly. And, I know what you mean about having someone to come home to and tell your day stories to. I, at least, have S21 and D16 at home while H is away working during the week.

Take care. (Gosh, you had me shrieking with laughter ... you sure know how to tell a story.)

You did have us to share it with, although not "real time" as you walk in the door. On the other hand, I've known of some marriages (Ms $3M for example) that broke up because one spouse insisted on being able to repeat the days events before the other one got in the door. Not a good thing to do. At least fix them a cocktail before unloading.
That's why I have cats. I can come in the door, get the lower leg rub, talk about the day I've had and no b@tching back at me. Of course, on occasion I get the WTH are you talking about look, but by then I've vented.
A good "pet head" and all is well.