M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Thanks to all. My STBXW went out again tonite..stings but I am OK.
I did something 'unusual' for myself. I paid for a telephone consultation.
.....But not from a DB coach...from my 'guru'. ...not to 'save my marriage'...but how to deal with this changeling....to save my kids....and me. To follow...
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
When is this going to end? Does your L have a general idea? And I'm so sorry that it still stings..dang...
How about a whole bunch of detachment work? You need it. You deserve it.
J-
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Agreed and I have a long post that I plan to you 25. I will also post what the counselling call was about.
Text to my W today. I approached her this morning, told her my office was closed for the holiday and I 'would like' some time with the kids tomorrow...perhaps take S8 to the movies. She replied in the affirmative. Wrong or right, I decided to act on her verbal communication since she shut the door on it last week:
Quote:
XXX....I am happy that you are finally getting time to go out and discover that which brings you contentment. I am also happy that in spite of the closed door option that you chose several days ago that we can talk even if on a limited basis. We have two children here that we have to raise and we cannot present a unified front to S8 and D5 to keep them from playing us against each other, nor discuss medical, educational and other issues or problems that might come up if we are only speaking by text. Enjoy your family today. FIB
Trying to lead. FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
How'd that "communication" go? I'm betting not so well. Trying to "lead" sounds good...
But you implicitly brought up her stupidity about the texts, and she'll probably see it as back handed compliments, as she'll likely also believe you were insincerely expressing happiness at her "contentment". Oh well. With the exception of parenting, when it's mandatory, why not keep a low profile?
Shoot, I don't know what to advise in your sitch. It's so odd, legally, and otherwise. Good luck, we're all rooting for you. (( j ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
She's verbally' making statements and listening to me if I initiate a sentence.
I'll call that a something.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Bottomline....I am forced to coexist with a woman who doesn't love me anymore, feels nothing but disgust for me, "needs to heal" because of me, considers me outside her social circle....and wants out.
On THAT note....taking my son to the movies today.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
We are all in the same boat - it is very painful but deal with it assertively, not as a victim.
You are focusing on her and what she is doing. Focus on you instead and what is good in your life. You are not being "forced" to do anything. You control your outlook.
